Sex and the City - Rant 1

What's the big deal with Sex and the City? I mean, Brian Griffin (Family Guy) apparently summed it up best after watching it with some gay friends: "... so it's a show about three hookers and their mom?"

I admit I watched a few episodes - no, I didn't follow it - just watched it when I switched on the TV and it happened to be on. It's a funny, witty show but if you listen to women everywhere, it has been made out to be some ... Movement ... something bigger than what it is, really.

At it's heart, Sex and the City is no feminist manna - the girls are obsessed with guys and their life is defined by who can successfully get which guy, and if all else fails, you can cure your heartache by buying an expensive pair of stilettos.

For me, Friends was more of a realistic portrait of 30-somethings who are single or leading single life. At least they didn't pretend to be happy and proud of their "love life is DOA" at 30.

In the end, Sex and the City is just another TV show, more often than not funny and entertaining, but just a show nevertheless. It is not meant to be an ideal of how 'professional' women should be.

For pure fun, take a look at the Sex and the Matrix parody.

If You Are Reading This ...

Dear C,

By the time you read this, I will have been long gone. I am sorry for doing this, but you have left me no choice. I know it will come as a bit of shock to you, especially because you have been such a materialistic self-absorbed bitch, but I am sorry - I just needed a change. I think you are pretty cool, but I just don't think we are right for each other.

First of all, I am compatible with Cancer and Leo, while you are cool with Capricon and Aquarius. I like long walks on the beach, you like making snowmen. I like action blockbusters, while you like Christmas feel-good movies. As for my favourite sport - do you even know what my favourite sport is?

This is not about you or about me "winning or losing", or about one of us being wrong - it is about two ways of being ... which do not fulfill each other, or go together. Though I had been open to having you visit with the thought that possibly we could 'try' again, after thinking about it a lot, I realize that it is not a good idea. I am very clear that we are not 'right' for each other.

Sincerely,

S.

Note: C = Canada, S = Summer.

Google A Fatwa

So you want to know some fact about Islam (for example is A equal to B). You decide based on severity of the question and the urgency, that an online fatwa site is the way to go. So you ask.

This will be how the typical reply seems to be composed.

Dear Brother / Sister in Islam,

We are very pleased/satisfied/impressed that you have chosen to further your knowledge of the deen and may Allah keep you always on the rightly guided path.

That is, of course, salutation. You expect that, and read on, wanting them to now answer your question. But the content will be slightly different.

To look at your question, is A = B, first we must understand where A and B are coming from. Before Islam, the root of the word A was from the A'ramic word 'Aaa'....

What?!

Now we look at historical contexts where A = D. Now D is slightly different from B, but we have the 2nd Caliph of the 4th Sultanate in the 1201 AD when ...

On and on ...

In the great work of Ahlan Wa Sahlan the great jurist Saqlain Al Karim has stated that A and Z are opposite in empirical terms ...

Finally,

So we can conclude that a majority of the jurists are of the opinion D may be equal to E in some situations, while a minority of the ulema are of the opinion that D can never be equal to E.

As for A = B?

Allah and His Messenger Knows Best.

Seriously, while the Internet is great for research and expanding one's knowledge and quick lookups, I have had too many people telling, "Look! This is Islamic! Here's a fatwa site" (and from the link you can see they have followed the first Google link to some keyword searches). Is that Islamic? And second, why don't these Fatwas ever get straight to the point?

Not So Hot For Cheerleaders

So I was at a friend's place, watching one of the IPL cricket matches on TV. It was Twenty20, so it was 3 hours long at most, and packed excitement, drama - and cheerleaders. Of course, his wife comes into the room at the exact time as the camera focuses on the cheerleaders.

"Oh, I thought you guys were watching cricket? This IS cricket? You should CHANGE THE CHANNEL!!"

My friend's house was not the only house troubled by the new phenomenon of cheerleaders in cricket. It seems the girls leave some in India hot and bothered.

India's leading socio-historian and writer, Ramchandra Guha, dubbed the phenomenon of cheerleaders despicable and degrading for the game of cricket.

"All the organizers are doing by making scantily-clad white women dance in front of huge crowds is to stoke the base, voyeuristic and sexual insecurities of the Indian male [emphasis mine - Mezba]. It is revolting, appalling and shows the game in very poor light," a disturbed Guha told HT.Rediff

Some of the cheerleaders are not that enthralled with the behavior of the crowd either.

Tabitha, who says she's originally from Uzbekistan, added, "Wherever we go, we do expect people to pass lewd, snide remarks but I'm shocked by the nature and magnitude of the comments people pass here. Be it a 70-year-old oldie or a 15-year-old kid, they all letch at us and make amorous advances. I feel very threatened. We are here to entertain them, to add a bit of glamor, but we are living in constant fear (of someone attempting something)." Hindustan Times

One commentator on Rediff says "Show some respect for cultural sensitivities maan. Grow up. You seem to be groomed under western materialistic philosophy which treats woman as commodities and less of as personalities. It's the great Indian tradition that has given utmost value to women; and Indian women have by far lived up to the expectations and the respect they command in the society." Of course when it's white women than all bets are off ...

I have always wondered why societies that give such "lofty status" to women, treat them as "pearls", have problems with their men behaving lecherously when seeing some scantily clad women, and then BLAME THE WOMEN. It's YOUR hormones.

As for me, I am just enjoying the cricket. Could I have done this post without the cheerleader pictures? Absolutely. But then, I wanted to add some glamor to this post! :-P

Facebook Friend Add Request

Overheard today on the bus:
Dude 1: "Man! I had like over 10 Add-as-Friend requests! I went through them and now there's only 1 request left ... it's been there over a month and I still haven't accepted it. I just don't WANT him to be added to my facebook!"

Dude 2: "Who's the request from?"

Dude 1: "It's from my Dad."

South Asians Most Visible In Canada

According to the latest census, South Asians are now the top visible minority group in Canada, outnumbering those of Chinese descent. Canada also has more South Asian Members of Parliament than from any other minority group, and politics in Canada has also become "browner", as evident by this BBC article.

Of course when Canadians talk of South Asians, they are talking mostly about peple with Indian, Pakistani or Sri Lankan origin (curiously the Star article references a country called "Tamil"). Bangladeshis are statistically insignificant (for now) even though we have our own town in Toronto, something Pakistani-Canadians cannot say!

What does all this increase in numbers mean for us? Does Canada now get more 'brownie' points? For the moment, beyond more samosa and halal stores, beyond more shops selling pirated DVDs, beyond more Desifests and cricket clubs, at the moment I don't see much changing.

Yes, it will be talked about for a while but in the end, what matters is action. And as the Star article correctly notes after the first few paragraphs, employment conditions for immigrants and those with foreign degrees in Canada remains abysmal. None of the foreign degrees are recognized and one could spend years trying to achieve accreditation. All this potential is lost to Canada. If you are a Muslim hibabi immigrant, you have a triple whammy.

I have been to Bangladeshi organizations where any meaningful cooperation is impossible because the top people are hung over their political differences. And this is not even politics in Canada - it's about who is a Awami League and who is a BNP supporter! These are political parties in Bangladesh! It is said if there's three Bangladeshis in a room there will be two political parties with one independent.

Numbers don't mean a thing unless people can get organized and united in demanding change. After all, Muslims are now the top religious group in the world (according to the Vatican), and fat lot of good it is doing to us!

Things I Learnt From The Movie Race

Yesterday I had the good fortune of watching the movie Race. The movie updated me on how India is progressing in ways more than one. For example:

I learned that nowadays police officers apparently don't need to wear uniforms any longer.This is of course so that they may blend in with the local population with ease and keep an eye on them. No study has yet been released on whether the local population of India wears designer shades, leather jackets or drives stunning cars (the old green police Jeep is out of fashion).

Speaking of police Inspectors, whereas in the old days each Inspector was accompanied by a fat dumb Hawaldar, nowadays they come accompanied with curvaceous, long-legged bimbettes wearing miniskirts and dresses with low necklines.Job duties may include cutting fruits, modeling skimpy swimsuits (all undercover of course) and practicing kissing with the boss.

Speaking of secretaries, if you are rich businessman in Bollywood, your secretary must be a super sexy model who, if the situation demands, will go to a club for you and dance on a mirrored floor.I am sure the next batch of graduates at the Indian School of Business must include Sexy Secretary as one of the job perks of being a manager in Negotiations class.

And finally, Indian men are no longer afraid to cry. Every time they engage in sex they must cry.Or maybe, just maybe, since they were doing it in the barn, Saif just got pricked by the Proverbial Needle in the Haystack.

All in all, it wasn't a bad movie!

Previously in this series:

Things I Learnt From The Movie Train

Things I Learnt From The Movie Vivah

Geert Wilders' Fitna - A Review

Geert Wilders, the Dutch MP who has made an anti-Islam film, argues that he has the right, under Freedom of Speech, to say what he wants. And what exactly is he saying? He wants the Quran to be banned because it is a "hate speech". So here is a man using Freedom of Speech to argue that another speech - the Quran - should be banned. His much talked about film, Fitna, is equally circular in logic.

As soon as I read that Geert Wilders' controversial Fitna was released on Liveleak, I immediately went over there to have a look. I wanted to see what the fuss was all about. After all, this is a movie that has the Dutch government in a fix and Muslims all over the world in a rage (um, so what's new).

I was expecting a motion picture masterpiece. Well, if not that, at least a thought provoking movie that made you pause, and reflect. After all, like it or not, Rushdie's Satanic Verses or Irshad Manji's Trouble With Islam were well written and thought provoking literary pieces. This was nothing.

It was as if a high school neocon googled "10 controversial verses of the Quran" and made a flash presentation of the verses, interspersed with images and news footage of 9/11, van Gogh murder and so on. Honestly, a high school student could have produced a better Islam-critical animation. That the verses and their "controversial" meanings (when taken out of context) has been explained numerous times is immaterial. The "movie" is amateurish.

In fact, the only good thing about Fitna is the recitation of the said verses of the Quran. The qari who recited those verses had a melodious voice.

Geert Wilders must have hoped Muslims would see his movie and renounce the Quran. In fact it made me laugh at his childish movie and then search Youtube for more melodious Quran recitations.

Bangladesh In Toronto News

It's not often Bangladesh finds itself in the news here in Toronto. We are more often an interesting anecdote in a major article about India, or just the place where "crippling floods" happen.

So imagine my surprise when driving to work yesterday morning I heard on 680 news that Toronto East General Hospital is reporting two cases of bird flu - an elderly couple who had recently visited Bangladesh. The news report also mentioned that Bangladesh had many cases of bird flu.

680 news has a weather guarantee but too bad it doesn't have a news guarantee because pretty soon (after hammering it all through rush hour with titles such as Bird Flu Scare in Toronto and comparison with SARS) it became clear that there was no bird flu.

A Toronto hospital says there's no reason to believe any of its patients have bird flu amid media speculation that a couple who returned from Bangladesh were potential carriers of a deadly strain of the virus.

Toronto East General Hospital said in a statement that it has recently treated an increased number of patients with flu-like symptoms, but that there's nothing to suggest any of them have H5N1 avian flu.

Bangladesh has been grappling with an outbreak of the virulent H5N1 strain among animals, but there have been no human cases reported in the country.[Source]

An even forceful denial is found here.

When I first heard the news, my mind wandered over to the SARS crisis. That time, everyone avoided Chinese owned businesses, and Chinatown had become a ghost town. Let's say this bird flu thing was real, would Banglatown (Danforth) become a similar ghost town? I don't think so. We still would have gone down there for our rui mach and lota pata.

It's strange that while one of the most widely reported complaints by other immigrant groups against Chinese immigrants is that they only mix with their own kind, it's Chinese businesses that would have suffered because they need other people. Banglatown apparently is immune.

Meanwhile, Toronto Star recently did a focus on Banglatown. Very ideal and utopia-like a picture it paints of us!

The annual Bangladesh Students Association (at Univ. of Toronto) show, this year titled Nirontor, is on this weekend downtown, and I will be checking it out. Last year I was involved in the show - everyone I keep running into this year asks me if I am doing a sequel! No, this year I will strictly be amongst the audience (which means, yes, I had to purchase a ticket!).

They have increased the prices this year to $15. Every year the prices seem to steadily go up, hopefully this year the quality change will also reflect that upward trend in price. That show is now big enough that the Minister of Education last year came to speak during the intermission, and it gets wide coverage in the community here.

But Honey, Dubai is A Shopper's Paradise!

From the construction site that is Dubai:

A newly-married couple came back from the brink after a folly on the part of the groom nearly rocked their wedding bliss.

The 22-year-old woman had sought divorce after her husband allegedly abandoned her in a shopping mall in Abu Dhabi, went home and slept for at least six hours and woke up to remember that he had left his wife unaccompanied in the mall.

Apparently, the man only realized his folly when his mother asked where his wife was. [Source]

Hmm ... maybe this guy was onto something. Maybe his memory wasn't so bad after all. But then why did his mother remind him to pick up her daughter-in-law?

Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi

(because the mother-in-law was also a bride, sometime).

As an aside, I find it interesting that the wife was immediately asking for divorce. For all the stereotype image of the oppressed Arab women, divorce in the Arab world is actually very high (close to 50%!) and many of such cases initiated by women.

How Healthy Is Halal?

The title of this post is of course, provocative. Halal comprises of a wide variety of food groups - some are good for you, some are bad for you. However, when I say Halal, I mean the food options open to a Muslim living in the West who observes Zabihah and eats only at certified Halal restaurants.


The above poster is a real one from a restaurant in Waterloo where I was visiting on the weekend. It's a small take-out/cafe style place, where the menu consisted of burgers, fries, chicken wings, shawarmas and gyros. Plus pop - of course. Given that neither fries nor burgers, as promoted by the poster, is fresh or healthy, it got me thinking.

Toronto and the surrounding areas are one of the most blessed in terms of Halal stores and restaurants in Canada. Yet, the over-riding category of these places seem to fall into one of the following:

1. "Arabic" places, serving shawarmas but also fast food like burgers, fries, chicken wings.
2. "Desi" places serving butter chicken and assorted South Asian ghee-flavored food cooked in a tub of oil.
3. Fast food - 'halal' KFCs, Pizza Pizza, and so on.
4. Chinese food (usually Hakka). Some are questionable Halal but that's a topic for another day.

There may be others but these are the common options. And I have to ask, how healthy are they?

Then of course, there are the 'Fillet-o-Fish' eaters. They go to non-Halal places and order the fish meal. Nothing wrong with that, except that in such restaurants the fish typically has consumed even more oil than a meat dish (for example the BK fish burger has twice as much calories as the Whopper).

If you want to eat grilled chicken, or a good sized steak, there's usually nothing. You want to eat healthy non-veg food, you can't do Halal. And that's the sad truth. In the end, doing what is right for you means skipping a healthy meal.

Ryerson Enters The Cyber World

OK I am back after a break, and if anyone is reading this (yes, I mean the both of you!) - break is good! I have opinions, and I am not afraid to share them!

Thankfully though, there are somethings I would NEVER divulge.

For example, the fact that if you are cheating, you should probably NOT broadcast it on Facebook.

Take a look at this story.

First-year student Chris Avenir is fighting charges of academic misconduct for helping run an online chemistry study group via Facebook last term, where 146 classmates swapped tips on homework questions that counted for 10 per cent of their mark.

If this is what passes for intelligence at Ryerson (sorry Haleem, MH) no wonder employers flock to U of T!

A "study group" is OK as long as you help each other understand concepts. It may be borderline if your buddy helps you understand a problem of a problem set, as you are supposed to understand it on your own. But when your Facebook group says "If you request to join, please use the forms to discuss/post solutions to the chemistry assignments. Please input your solutions if they are not already posted" - I am sorry, you have crossed the line.

Yes, yes. I know everyone cheats in university.

But this guy got caught. *wink*

"Islamic Financing Is A Con Job"

So I had decided to leave the blogosphere, only for Tarek Fatah (of all people) to bring me back!

I was listening to John Moore of the CFRB yesterday evening and he had Tarek Fatah on for a few minutes. Fatah was criticizing "Islamic Banking", calling it a "con job and scam" by the Imams. John Moore agreed with him, terming it as "religious foofery at it's finest".

Now John is a great talk show host, but I wish he had spent a little more time on this topic than he did (after all he had just spent 20 minutes on the ethics of an office pool). Fatah was on for about 5 minutes, and then John just had 3 callers before he moved on to another topic. The first caller was sounded obviously angry, foaming-at-the-mouth-mullah kind of guy, the second caller seemed to be the apologist Irshad Manji kind of person, while the third caller was the best. He actually, for the very first time ever that I can remember, gave a reasonable answer as to how his house was Islamically financed. However time was short, and John, usually such an open minded fellow, seemed to have made up his mind, Islamic banking was just an accounting trick, and that was that.

Now I don't know much about the details of "Islamic financing" (and yes there is a reason why I put it in quotes), but whenever I have asked someone about this they have launched into such a complex explanation, full of terms like mudarabah, muajjal, Ijarah and Sukuk - that soon I got lost. Excuse me, but shouldn't there be a SIMPLE explanation?

Last year at RIS, I actually asked a couple of the merchants in the bazaar section, who were hawking "Islamic Finance Bonds" (now there's an oxymoron if there was one) as to how it exactly worked. They started to speak, and soon I was left thinking, "Boy, this is just one big scam! They are not dealing with interest, but they just take it and call it something else!"

Obviously, there is legitimate Islamic Banking and there are the con artists. Shariah-compliant banking is the fastest growing segment of the financial services industry and millions of Muslims can't be wrong, but what exactly is Islamic financing and how does it work? Please, someone tell me in simple words.

I am not going to go into this whole debate of usury vs interest. Rather, I need simple answers to these THREE questions.

1) I want to lend Mira $5,000 (in 2008), and Mira has promised to pay me back $5,000 in five years (in 2013). Now we know inflation is a fact, value of money decreases every year. So $5,000 in 2008 is actually worth more than $5,000 in 2008 than 2013. So why should Mira not pay me more than $5,000?

2 a) I have $100,000 to lend to Mira. What is my incentive for doing so, if I cannot earn anything back in interest (and, given the example in (1), actually lose money)?

2 b) I want to borrow $100,000 to start a business. I don't want to make anyone partners in my business, I just want to borrow the money and return it after so many years when my business is up and running. What incentives can I offer the lender if I am not paying them interest?

3) If I am lending someone money, I am losing the opportunity cost of that money. If I lend Mira $100 for 1 week, I can't use that $100 for 1 week. How will Mira compensate me for that 1 week?

Taare Zameen Par - A Review

I saw the movie Taare Zameen Par yesterday. It was a choice of either that or Kite Runner. And frankly, I am glad I chose Taare Zameen Par.

Without giving the story away, it's about a kid who has a problem and his teacher, Aamir Khan, who deals with it and teaches the rest of us a thing or two.

This year saw two movies (Chak De and Taare Zameen Par) that were both away from the run-of-the-mill romances, minus heroines and starring the leading man in equal footage with the rest of the cast - and yet both look to be big hits. It is proof that there is space in Bollywood for non-formulaic movies - as a long as its well made.

Taare Zameen Par has a solid script, excellent acting and does not drag on or insert unnecessary drama when there is no need to. It is a simple story, told well. You can take your whole family to the movie and enjoy a great Eid and New Year's treat. Two songs from the movie, Maa and Bum Bole are very good and well picturized.

If you have not seen this movie yet, you should.

Rating: 5 stars.

Eid Can Be Fun, No... Really!

I was watching Little Mosque on the Prairie. I admit - I had given up on the show in the first season - only to fall in love with it in its second season. It's a perfect blend of comedy, satire, poignancy and awareness, all packaged in appropriate sized doses of humour. And the last episode was about Eid and Christmas.

Admit it, Christmas looks great. Decorating the Christmas tree, shopping for gifts, hiding presents, caroling, cookies, family gathering, decorating the house and lighting the streets - it all looks fun. And what do we have for Eid?

I used to remember Eids of my childhood in the Middle East and it was mostly fun. We would have similar activities - waking up early for the morning prayers, chanting "Allahu Akbar, Allahu Akbar, Walillahil Hamd!", going around the houses, eating gulab jamun and roshogolla and shaan papri and parathas, wearing the new clothes (I remember as a kid loving the new Eid clothes so much I slept with the shoes next to me), opening the new gifts (the gun that let out smoke was great!) and then on top - Eidi! I mean - free money AND gifts - Eid beats Christmas, or so I thought.

Well, nowadays Eid in the West sucks. I am going to come and say it plainly what Muslims want to shy away from - Eid here sucks. And the fault is mostly of the Muslims.

First of all, not everyone celebrates Eid on the same day. Admit it or not, and don't chalk it up to "diversity of Muslims" - Eid needs to be celebrated on the same day by Muslims in the city. The fault is entirely on (parts of) the community, who want to celebrate Eid in union with their relatives back home. On the other hand you have our some others (hello Babar) who still wants to sight the moon with the naked eye and says no to calculations. So... I just wish we would ALL PICK ONE SYSTEM and stick with it. Whatever it is.

It's no fun calling up someone to say "Eid Mubarak" and they go "Ya? Well good for you I am still fasting!". Immediately you lose half the community there.

Second, it seems Muslims go out of their way to have other stuff on Eid. When this wonderful country gives you a perfect excuse to defer exams, get personal days or other reasons to avoid work and studies, citing "religious reasons", there is NO VALID EXCUSE to have exams on Eid day, or not take off even 2 hours off work for Eid prayers, or have other commitments not Eid related on Eid day.

"Where's Montu?"

"Oh he's at school - he had exams today."

"Montu, why didn't you defer the exams? It's Eid!"

"Oh, I just wanted to get it over with. Besides, Eid sucks anyways."

Third, do you plan on how to make Eid fun?

If you are a kid growing up in the West, how will that kid appreciate Islam when supposedly the most fun thing associated with Islam - Eid - sucks? Anything that has to be fun has to be planned. And Eid has stuff associated with it that is, believe it or not, fun.

If you are a young girl, did you plan a henna party? Call up other girls and arrange to have everyone come over to someone's house and have a henna party. Get some music, get some dance beats, and get it on. No, music is not haraam and it's all girls anyways.

If you are a parent, did you buy new clothes for all your kids? It IS a Eid tradition and yes, it is almost fard. Save some money, and don't say you don't have as it should be part of the budget, but GET SOME NEW CLOTHES for Eid. If you can buy new clothes on Boxing Day you can buy them for Eid day.

If you are a guy what are you doing? If the weather permits you should plan a family or friends day thing. BBQ, games, outing, movies, whatever! Make it a tradition. We had a tradition of a huge cricket game on Eid when we lived in the Middle East (Petrol Pump East versus Electra Road). Ever since we came to Canada it has changed to going bowling with the neighbors in the evening. Traditions change but having fun should not.

Right now our community here always has a Eid dinner on the weekend after Eid - and it's full of cultural programs (Bengali dances, music, songs and of course FOOD), but bottom line - the practises, the cooking (women complain about it but they secretly love it - truthful about most things related to women) - etc. but bottom line, it is fun.

Eid should not just be going to prayers in the morning in a badly organized mosque and then coming home, calling some few relatives and then going to the mall by yourself. Eid should be fun and it's on you to make it so.

Hi, I Would Like To Apologize For

Hi, I am a Muslim.

And today, I would like to apologize for:

[x] Killing a female relative for committing a sin

[x] Punishing a rape victim

[x] Rioting over perceived insults to the Prophet

[x] Blowing up buildings to make a political point

[x] Calling for ban on offensive books, ideas and symbols

[x] Believing that my holy book gives me the right to beat my wife

[x] Clerics treating women and children as 'uncovered meat'

Thank you.

Please Give Liya Your Support

My friend Liya's uncle is fighting a discrimination case today. Please head over there and give her your support.

This shit really pisses me off, especially after the Vancouver airport taser event.

And what pisses me off even more is the attitude of some people who then go "oh our police can do no wrong the guy must have deserved it, they get a lot of shit for doing their job".

"I am not on Facebook"

A conversation with a good friend of mine.

Him: Give me the link to your album of your Bangladesh trip.

Me: It's on Facebook.

Him: I disabled my Facebook account.

Me: So you are not returning to Facebook?

Him: Yes, I am not going back to Facebook. I am making a point. It takes too much of my time and people are very immature on Facebook. I would rather not see that side of them.

Me: But the only online album I have is on Facebook.

Him: Go to the album and copy the public link URL and give that to me so I can see your albums without going on Facebook.

Me: But you will be seeing my albums which are on Facebook.

Him: But I won't be going into Facebook. Oh yeah, and send me those other albums as well, plus ... blah blah...

Me: So you will be seeing my Facebook albums, as well as those others, all of which are on Facebook, but you will not be going into Facebook, and thus still be making your point about how Facebook is encroaching into our lives and how you reject such encroachment?

Him: Exactly.

News Around The World As I See It

So Bill Clinton thinks the media should focus better on his wife's "record". He also said "I would pick her and be here if we weren't married.".

For the, er, record, Bill Clinton DID pick someone else while he was married, and the only record I can think of Hillary is that she is Bill's wife (and she must not have done a very good job there too).

I don't know what bugs me most about Hillary. To me she is someone who sniffs the polls and decides her position of the day. I remember she kissed Arafat's wife once and the Jews in New York made a big deal out of it - then she became vehemently pro-Israel to appease them.

Then there's Barack Obama. The guy is all nice guy and then he wants to bomb Pakistan (hey, gotta show them I am tough, eh). Then people say he's not really like that just pretending to be tough to appeal to those who won't vote for him any way. Uh, sure. Whatever.

We also have Mahmoud Ahmadinejad (if you can't pronounce that think A-Mad-Dinner-Jacket) who wants to build a "World Islamic Court".

"Some international organizations, specially the Security Council, have not been formed based on justice. The way this council is governed is a symbol of injustice with global effects," the Iranian president said.

Er, sure. Justice, right? Given Iran's fantastic justice system, where women are put into jail for not wearing the proper scarf or be beaten to death for photographing a building, I am sure other countries are begging to sign up.

In Dubai they have smashed a major vice ring.

Dubai is considered to be the most liberal of the seven-emirate group, with a booming sex industry.Anti-trafficking campaigners say Dubai authorities often turn a blind eye to prostitution for economic reasons.

I mean, when you hire lots of poor South Asian men, pay them 4 Dhs a day, forbid them from going home except once every 2 years, and that too for mere 2 weeks, you'd think sex would be the last thing on their minds, right? Then again, earning 4 Dhs a day, and prostitution reportedly a "booming" business, the customers must be getting a bargain. No wonder Dubai is called the Shopper's Paradise.

Meanwhile, you know those Sardar jokes you are forwarding to me? Very bad news if you are in India.

Toronto is now the most multi-cultural city in the world. Someone now wants to build a 'black only' school here. What a stupid idea. I mean, next, what if Asians now want a whole chunk of Toronto to themselves (besides Scarborough, that is)?

And that's the News Around The World, as I see it, this week.

Woman Arrested For Naming Horse After Prophet

Medina News Network (MNN): A young housewife who is charged in Medina with insulting Islam and showing contempt for religious beliefs will be brought to court on Friday, the Shariah court has announced. Aisha bint Abu Bakr was arrested after complaints that she had named her toy horse "Sulaiman".

"It is true." Her husband, Muhammad, is reported to have confessed. "I entered the house and I saw her playing with her dolls and toy horses. When I asked her what game she was playing, she answered 'Sulaiman's horses'."

In her defense statement, Aisha stated that she did not intend to cause offense, and only mentioned that "Sulaiman's horses also had wings" in reply to a query by her husband as to why her toy horses had wings.

Some Islamist groups are also upset at Muhammad's reaction to his wife's 'travesty'.

"Rather than admonishing Aisha, Muhammad laughed until his molar teeth could be seen." A community member commented under anonymity. "His failure to 'correct' his wife is clearly another insult to our Prophet."

Medina's top clerics have called for the full measure of the law to be used against Ms. Aisha and labeled her actions part of a Meccan plot against Islam.

But in Mecca, the Islamic Human Rights Commission was among the many (secret) Muslim groups to call for her immediate release.

Chairman Abbas ibn Muttalib said: "Both the Government of Medina, and the media, must refrain from using Islam and Islamic principles to legitimise this fiasco, which may result in the unjust conviction of an innocent person, and which will only lead to the promotion of Medinaphobia and further demonization of Islam." He also stressed that Islam was the fastest growing religion in Arabia.

In a separate news, charges were filed against Aisha's husband Muhammad himself for insulting the name of the Prophet of Islam, Muhammad (peace be upon him) and hurting religious sentiments of Muslims. During the treaty of Hudaibiyah, Muhammad was reported to have crossed out the words "Muhammad the Prophet of God" and replaced it with "Muhammad son of Abdullah".

In issuing the arrest warrants for Muhammad and Aisha, the lead prosecutor stated: "We are an Islamic nation that cannot tolerate, be silent or be lax when someone, whoever he or she is, insults our Prophet and sanctities."