Thursday, January 12, 2006

Road Rage Ishtyle

Beside every man acting stupid will be a hot woman.

On the way back from bowling, where I got a ride with Shuaib and Sushmita, we were going north on Warden Avenue when out of nowhere this red Mustang emerged, from a parking lot onto the main road, completely swerving and cutting us off. I think Shuaib literally fell on the horn - it was a prolonged, loud, series of blasts.

The brake lights of the Mustang lit up, and the driver's door opened. Oho! Churir upor shina juri! The guy wanted a piece of us, eh! Shuaib got out as well. And since I was the other guy in the car, I had to get out too. Not that I think Shuaib needed any help - he used to work as a part time bouncer for night clubs in our college days - I was there to stop any fights.

The driver of the Mustang was an Indian guy, our age, with his jeans pulled way up, hair combed back, covered with either gel or Dabur Amla, red pullover, sunglasses on (even though it was 10 pm). In other words, a Hero Hiralal wannabe. He started to shout at Shuaib, who also started to shout back.

Then the door on the passenger side of the Mustang opened. And this woman stepped out. And we stopped arguing. For a moment. She was a really good looking woman. Really hot. Traffic stopper. And she was with this guy? My (unproven) theory was that the guy is a cousin who had come to visit Toronto and she has to show him around.

Anyways, now that the hot woman is on the scene, the Mustang dude decided he had to appear macho. So he stepped forward, clenched his fist, extended a finger out and yelled "Ya, so F*** you!", and repeated the action for good measure.

Except, the finger he extended was his index finger.




Shuaib looked at me, pointed with his index finger, and uttered "F*** you????" I pointed back at him. And we both started to laugh. The guy now appeared completely puzzled, so he "pointed" at us again and swore. And we burst out laughing again. And then his cousin/girlfriend/hot lady joined in! She didn't want to, she was trying to stop herself, but it was funny! And the more she tried to stop, the more she burst out laughing.

Oh it was bad for him. I almost fell sorry for the guy. We were still laughing as we headed back to our car and drove off.

Moral of the story: If you are new to Canada and want to swear, learn the gesture first. Not to mention it's rude.

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Tuesday, January 10, 2006

The Lessons of Eid ul Adha

Let's tell the truth. For some reason, Eid ul Adha is not Eid ul Fitr. Then, you are staying hungry in the daytime for 30 days, you are being nice, learning to speak the truth, caring for the poor and oppressed and praying at night - a major lifestyle change for a month. Then Eid comes. It's a day when Allah, rather than have you celebrate someone else's achievements or a historical event, has decided He, God Almighty, wants to celebrate YOUR achievements. Your Fasts, Your prayers, Your efforts. That's Eid ul Fitr. No wonder we enjoy that Eid.

This Eid, on the other hand, is more somber. Here, Allah is teaching us the lessons in life. It's about His friend, Ibrahim (Abraham), Ibrahim's wife Hagar, and their son Ismail (Ishmael). Allah calls Ibrahim the Khalilullah, or 'a Friend of Allah'.

Hagar. Never before has a woman been honoured any more by any religious practice other than the Hajj. I am getting goosebumps as I write this, I am struck by the grandiose of it all. A mother, abandoned in the desert by her husband and with a baby son just because Allah has ordered the man to do so. The baby started to cry for water. Hagar thought she saw water at the foot of Mount Safa. She ran there. It was a mirage. Then she turned to Mount Marwah. Was there water there? She ran towards Mount Marwah. It was another mirage. Seven times she ran between the two hills. Who only but a mother could do so for her child? To this day, billions of Muslims since the time of Prophet Muhammad (S) has continued to run seven times between the hills of Safa and Marwah, during Hajj, to honour that mother Hagar.

As Hagar came back to her baby, a well of clear water emerged at Ismail's feet. This well of water is today called Zam-zam, and is still flowing, after thousands of years. This is our Holy Water.

Throughout all these trials, none of the three, Ibrahim, Hagar or Ismail rebuked Allah for asking of them the greatest of sacrifices. They never questioned God's orders. Ibrahim was ordered by Allah to sacrifice Ismail, and he was ready to do so. Allah then ordered a ram to be sacrificed instead. All He wanted from Ibrahim was his willingness to obey His commands. To this day, Muslims all over the world sacrifice a goat, cow or some other grazing animal and give the meat to the poor and needy to honour Ibrahim's readiness to accept God's will.

The lessons of this Eid are many. Wealth and luxury cannot alone make a person happy, sacrifices for those we love are necessary. Nothing in this life comes easy, trials and tribulations are from God, as are subsequent good times. It's not just about me, sometimes it's about Not-me. Whatever hardships we encounter through life, we must thank Allah, try to improve our situation and ask for His help. There is always someone with a more worse hardship than us. And never lose hope - remember, Allah helps those who help themselves.

Finally, those who want to enjoy this Eid will. Take a day off. Put some mehendi on. Get some new clothes. Teach your friends and children the story of our father, Ibrahim. Meet friends, visit relatives and give gifts.

Eid Mubarak.

Let the man of means spend according to his means, and the man whose resources are restricted, let him spend according to what Allah has given him. Allah puts no burden on any person beyond what He has given him. After a difficulty, Allah will soon grant relief.
- (Quran, 65:7)

Related Link: The Man Who Was God's Friend

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Monday, January 09, 2006

Canada Leaders' Debate Review - 2

There can be no doubt who won the debate. The country is eager for a change, and the Leader of Opposition Stephen Harper and his Conservative Party have a lead in the polls. There seems to be numerous scandals involving the government. Going into the debate Prime Minister Paul Martin had to paint Harper as a right wing Republican, show his ideas were useless, take on Duceppe while ignoring Layton. Harper, on the other hand, had to merely give straight answers. Martin won the debate with a display that may just give his Liberals, lagging in the polls, a fighting chance.

Martin defended his good record of managing the economy and fiscal health of the country, and tore the Conservative platform to shreds. How will giving parents money ("a dollar a day") help create any child care space? How will increasing the tax rate on low income Canadians give them tax relief? Martin rightly called it 'non-sense'. When Harper tried to lie that low income Canadians pay no income tax (anyone earning above the minimum, which the Conservatives plan to lower, pay 15%), Martin reiterated his plan that provides tax relief to ALL Canadians. This is probably the first time a Conservative platform is campaigning on increased tax rates. How will giving transit users a (very negligent) tax cut pay for another bus on the road, another subway line? Harper had no answers to any of these questions, merely repeating his talking points. As someone who had found the Conservative platform attractive, this debate was an eye-opener.

And Duceppe. He was unimportant, boring and callous today. Martin, to paraphrase CalgaryGrit, 'bitch-slapped' Duceppe around. When Duceppe said all people of Quebec wanted to separate, Martin replied he was from Quebec and he wanted no such thing. Martin showed why Bloc would be powerless against a Stephen Harper government. Martin responded to Harper stating Martin was afraid of debating Duceppe by saying, "Well, I'm here!"

And Layton. Boy, get out of the car salesman mode. Same tone, same reply, every question. To this viewer, there can only be one winner of this debate.

Paul Martin.

Related Links:
  • Canada's Government Falls
  • Comedy Of Canadian Elections
  • 1st Canada Leaders' English Debate Review

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  • Sunday, January 08, 2006

    Pakistan Vs India Uncles

    Before the advent of ATN, we used to watch Ind-Pak series at Sak's place. His house was centrally located (close to the highways), he had satellite, the TV was big and in the big basement. Everyone I knew from the Bengali community (and some) used to show up for those games. I have noticed that the 'uncles' who come for the games can be divided into the following categories:

    Genuine Cricket Lovers: These are uncles who come because they love the game and cannot watch it elsewhere. Sachin would hit Danish for a boundary. One of these uncles would then comment, "Oh, that's just like 1998 in Sharjah when he cover drove Shane Warne for a boundary on the 4th ball of the 26th over." Another would then follow, "Yes, but what about the 5th ball of the 15th over in the Chittagong test in 2004?". All of the group would then nod knowingly.

    Support-The-Mussalman-Team Group: Having noticed I was cheering Sehwag boundaries with a bit more enthusiasm he asked me if I supported India or Pakistan. Upon hearing the reply 'India' he almost had a stroke. "You canNOT support India," He thundered, "they are a Hindu team!!! Thou shalt support our Muslim brothers of Pakistan. Do you know how much harm the Indian spies are doing in Bangladesh?" Lot of uncles belong to this category. Makes no sense to me. I prefer watching good batting to good bowling, so support India. Other times I support Desis, so if Pakistan is playing England I will support Pakistan. These uncles forget that a lot of Bengalis, Pakistanis are Hindus, and India has more Muslims as a whole than Pakistan.

    'If-The-Devil-Plays-Pakistan-I-Will-Support-Devil' Group, also known as the 1971-ers: These will immediately counter the previous group, saying Pakistan did this and that during 1971, they are not an example of true Muslims and so on. Again, batting, bowling and other cricketing reasons are thrown out of the window. Yahya Khan, Tikka Khan and that 'hated Bhutto' will enter into the realms of discussion.

    'Cricket-Can-Be-As-Exciting-As-Hockey' Group: These uncles emigrated to Canada in the 1980s. There were hardly any cricket lovers, much less cricket, on Canadian TV back then. In their attempt to assimilate they had to forget cricket and start liking hockey. Now, isolated from their fellow desi uncles, they come to these matches just because it is the 'cool' thing to do in uncleland. They will provide comments such as "I don't know why we play 50 overs one team and then another team plays 50 overs. It should be 10 overs one team, then another team 10 overs, then back to first team for another 10 ...", or something equally hockey-like such as "Kaif should just punch Afridi and smack him with 'those' sticks".

    'I-Am-Still-In-Bangladesh' Uncle: Usually the group with only one or two members, having recently emigrated. They do not understand why the Pakistanis here don't get a flag, jump on their cars, and roam around the neighbourhood tooting the horn and disturbing everyone's peace because they won a ODI match against India that will be forgotten in a couple of days. After all they did that in Danforth when Bangladesh beat Australia. Everyone saluted their first victory by greeting them with a closed fist and one finger extending out to prove how peaceful Canada is, tai na.

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    Friday, January 06, 2006

    Vatican Flexes Muscle - II

    I have never stopped from criticizing religious figures when I believe they, and not the religion itself, are the problem. My Catholic friends, I am sorry, but you should have had a different Pope. When Pope Benedict XVI was elected, I read he was a hardline conservative Pope. I don't mind when he tells Christians to be more religious, but he should stop involving the Church into a state's affairs. No religious interference in our politics, I say.

    The Holy See has signed an agreement with Slovakia to reduce the number of abortions. Make no mistake, the country is 70% Catholic and this will restrict the right of women to have an abortion. Currently Slovakia permits abortion till the 12th week. The Vatican has always opposed any abortion, and this is a covert move to influence the Slovakian health system to restrict abortion. Indirectly, the Vatican is opposing a woman's right to choose, and is even restricting women who are not Catholics or subscribe to their beliefs in their freedoms.

    I am not arguing for or against abortion. It is a controversial topic. Most jurists in Islam permit abortion within the first 120 days, as it is the belief that the Ruh (soul) enters the fetus after 120 days. After that, mother's health takes preference - so Islam has never equated the life of a fetus with the life of the mother, but placed greater emphasis on the mother's life [Abortion: The Islamic View].

    I think early abortion is a necessary evil in the society we live in today. This society has casual sex, extra marital sex and now swinging. As such, unplanned pregnancies will occur, and if legal early abortion is restricted, then women will be having back alley abortions or be bad mothers. Since we as a society have loose morals, early abortion is a necessary evil. If the Pope wants to fight abortion, he should first fight against the casual sex culture of society.

    This Pope does not understand that. He is against women priests (we have always had women aalims), contraception and condoms (the Catholic Church's stance on that has directly contributed to increased HIV rates in Africa), priestly celibacy (while blaming sexual abuse of young boys by priests on gays), and divorce. It got involved in the Terry Schiavo case in the United States.

    I will end by asking the Pope one question. You opposed a passive euthanasia for Terry Schiavo. Her husband cannot get a divorce in the eyes of the Church as the Catholic church also opposes divorce. And finally, you will not allow the husband a second wife as the Church is also pro-monogamy (a fact not supported by any Biblical verse). He cannot end her life, get divorced from her or marry another woman. So what do you want the husband to do? Thank God (yes) you do not control policy in our countries.

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    Canada Is Gold


    Members of Team Canada celebrate after winning the gold medal with a 5-0 victory over Team Russia at the World Junior Hockey championships in Vancouver Thursday, Jan. 5.


    Team Canada's Kristopher Letang watches Russia's Nikolai Lemtyugov fall to the ice


    Canada goalie Justin Pogge, right, shakes hands with Russian star Evgeni Malkin

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    Thursday, January 05, 2006

    Hajj Question

    I had an argument with my cousin who is now in Mecca, performing the Hajj (pilgrimage) there. This is to be his fifth year running, performing the Hajj, inshAllah. My argument with him was this: Hajj is a responsibility to be performed ONCE in a lifetime. And here he was, going for the fifth time in five years. I told him:

    1. You don't need to do it anymore. If you go, someone who wants to go for his first time cannot, as there is a quota on pilgrims from each country and you are taking up space.
    2. You add to the logistical problems at Mecca. You take up hotel space there that could go to someone else, and so on.
    3. You are spending time away from family (he will be away one month) and money (costs him around $6000+) that could be spent on your family.

      Abu Hurayra reported that the Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said, "There are four dinars: a dinar which you give to a poor person, a dinar you give to free a slave, a dinar you spend in the Way of Allah, and a dinar which you spend on your family. The best of them is the dinar which you spend on your family." (Bukhari: 751)

      I told him since he doesn't need to do Hajj any more he should spend that money elsewhere.

    He refuted my arguments thus:

    1. The quota system is unofficial. Lot of spaces are left empty so he is not 'blocking' anyone. I could not verify this.
    2. He has done Hajj before so he knows all the 'tricks'. Where to stay, all tips (to avoid dehydration, where to make what dua (prayer), extensive knowledge of the rituals needed), where to stand when stoning-the-devil and so on. Thus he can advice other people (in fact he is part of a Hajj delegation from the mosque and has the role of advisor).
    3. He is loaded (really loaded) so money is not an issue.


    Everyone took his side (except, tellingly, his wife) saying he is 'guest of Allah', answering a 'calling', 'who am I a sinner to question him a 4-time-Hajji' and so on. I don't know if I am right or not (would appreciate answers) but to me, there are other ways to spend that money (sponsoring orphans, donating to the mosque, etc.) than going once again to Hajj. On the other side, everyone who did Hajj said it is a memorable, once in a lifetime experience, and inshAllah, I hope to undertake it soon.

    However, there seems to me an obsession in our South Asian culture to perform repeat Hajjs, as if that somehow gives you a Get-out-of-Jail-free card. Similarly we measure a man's value by how many times he prays, goes to the mosque, how much knowledge of religion a person has rather than by how a person is.


    Pilgrims pray the Night Prayer at the Grand Mosque, Mecca.

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    Wednesday, January 04, 2006

    The Psychology Experiment

    I got a call from my friend J today, he wanted me to help out this female friend of his, S, with her experiment. S is a psychology graduate student, and she is looking for some volunteers to help answer some questions. Atleast that's what J told me. Having nothing planned after work, I agreed his request. I called up S and fixed up a time with her. Around 5 pm, after negotiating through the maze that is Univ. of Toronto's Sydney Smith building's basement, I came across the 'Psychology Lab'.

    The world 'LAB' on the door should have been my first clue.

    I knocked and entered. S was there. She was pretty young for someone studying for a doctorate. S pointed me to a computer, gave me a set of headphones and explained to me what I had to do.

    "Basically, the program on the computer is going to show you a few images," She said, "After around 4 or 5 images, it will ask you a multiple-choice question. You answer the question with the answer you think is most correct. If it's wrong, a buzzer will beep on your headphone and you will get the chance to do it again until you get it right. When you get it right, the program will display on the screen that you are right, and we will repeat the process again, with different pictures and questions, for around 20 minutes."

    It seemed simple enough. See pictures. Answer questions. Repeat. So I put on the headphones, S started the program, gave me a thumbs up, and went back to her cubicle. I turned and focused my attention on the screen in front of me.

    Four images (a flower, a bird, a sunny sky and a meadow) came on the screen, one at a time, each staying for no longer than a couple of seconds. Then came the question.

    "If A is to B today what Gold is to Silver tomorrow, what is K equal to?"

    Alright. WTF? There were four choices. None of which made any sense. It took me three tries before I saw the word 'correct' on the screen. Then the program moved on to another set of images. These were a bit darker. The weather in the landscape was gloomy. Rain. Wait, was that.. a ... girl? In a bikini? Another weird question. I answered.

    The pictures followed. It was definitely a girl. Negligible amount clothes on. For a moment I thought the program launched the dirty screensaver of the lab supervisor whose computer it was, but I turned to S, she just smiled and beckoned me to continue. This was definitely weird. Then came another set of pictures. The girl was gone. Ew, it was the scene of an accident. Blood. Gore. Stupid silly question.

    I began to curse J as I randomly pressed buttons to finish the answers as quick as possible. And so it continued. The pictures alternated between sunny landscapes, bomb explosion scenes, Maxim girl pictures and pictures that can only be found in the computer of a Trekkie living in his parents' basement at 40 years of age. Mind you, this is taxpayer funded university research project I was helping out S with. That's what I kept telling myself as the eyes continued to do zina. It's for science.

    After it was over, I got up, caught my breath, mumbled something at S's profuse thanks for the help, and turned to leave. S asked me if I wanted to know what the experiment was about. My curiosity perked, I answered in the affirmative.

    "Well, we have a theory in psychology about implicit learning," S replied, "when you feel you learn how to answer questions without understanding it. And our theory is when a person is mentally stimulated, or aroused if you will, their implicit learning works better. So we show pictures of corpses or girls if the subject is male to stimulate..."

    "I'm sorry, I gotta go." I cut her off. "Very ... Interesting ... Theory."

    Boy was I glad to get out. This was a girl who can talk about arousal and dead bodies and girls in the same sentence. She can be a psychologist alright. Honestly what sort of weird, messed up theories are concocted by psychologists nowadays? You have a problem, wait, let me arouse you. Mentally.

    When I called up J later, he replied, "Ya, about that experiment ..."

    I think I needed therapy after that.

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    Monday, January 02, 2006

    Munich - A Review

    "There's enough food in here to feed Bangladesh."

    That's the only line I found offensive in the movie. As soon as that was said, all 11 of us who went to see the movie were like, "They mentioned Bangladesh. Oh wait, heeeeey!"

    Give credit to Steven Spielberg. He is a Jewish man, making a movie on a Jewish massacre, and he manages to strike a balanced note. Yes, the Israeli terrorism atrocities are only talked about, whereas the Palestinian terrorism attacks are shown, and we know visuals leave a stronger effect than mere words. Even when the Israeli assassins led by Eric Bana's Avner are questioning their policies, their actions, their targets, Spielberg shows the original Munich attack, as to why this is all taking place. However, Spielberg understands there are lot of gray areas in the Israel-Palestine conflict, and even as a Jew he does not shy away from asking tough questions. Just because Jews have been oppressed for thousands of years does not make them a decent race, says one of the assassins. My father never gassed a Jew, says an Arab terrorist. In the end, the movie's moral is tough, and depressing. Hate begets hate.

    "Allah forbids you not, with regard to those who fight you not for (your) Faith nor drive you out of your homes, from dealing kindly and justly with them: for Allah loveth those who are just." (Quran, 60:08)

    "We did aforetime grant to the Children of Israel the Book the Power of Command, and Prophethood; We gave them, for Sustenance, things good and pure; and We favoured them above the nations." (Quran, 45:16)

    "Those who believe (in the Quran), and those who follow the Jewish (scriptures), and the Christians and the Sabians,- any who believe in Allah and the Last Day, and work righteousness, shall have their reward with their Lord; on them shall be no fear, nor shall they grieve." (Quran, 2:62)

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    Sunday, January 01, 2006

    New Year Charades

    Satyam Shivam Sundaram.

    That's what the card said. How do you act it out?

    The evening started with me not arguing with mom for once about the timing of a party. You see, my parents are very punctual people. If someone tells them to be at an party at oh, say 8 pm, they will be there at 8 pm. You lose nothing by being a punctual Bengali, except 2 hours of your life waiting for the other Bengalis to show up. Ever since the other car broke down and had to be sold, we have been depending on my car for everything, and are waiting for next summer before buying another one. So the earlier I could drop my people off at their party, the earlier I would be free to do what I want.

    We were playing Charades at a friend's place for our new year party. For some reason Hindi movie names were also allowed. I also noticed the guys were giving English ones, and the girls Hindi.

    Now, *modest cough here* I am considered somewhat good at Charades. So inevitably I get stuck with some of the tougher (read: Hindi) ones. After getting Satyam Shivam Sundaram I was given Ganga Jamuna Saraswati to act out. And you can probably guess the guys would rather drink mud than see a movie called Ganga Jamuna Saraswati. Fortunately we had a few girls in the team as well.

    Hindi movies are terrible to use in Charades. First, we are accustomed to thinking in English. Second, you can make so many varieties with Hindi movies. Use Hum, Tum, Main, Pyaar, Hain and you got a dozen Hindi movies.
    Hum Tumpe Marte Hain
    Hum Tum
    Main
    Pyaar
    Pyaar Pyaar Pyaar
    Maine Pyaar Kia

    And now add Dil to that mix and you got a never ending supply of Charades picks. The toughest English one I could think of was One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest and To Kill a Mockingbird.

    Sometimes you just give a movie to a person just to see them act it out. One time, with some other friends, we had one girl, Sangeeta, who is a bit conservative and shy. Once we were doing Charades, and she was asked (by me *imitating Jon Stewart imitating Bush laugh*) to act out Basic Instincts. After two or three attempts at trying to explain 'Basic', she decided to do 'that' scene. As soon as she pulled out a chair, people were tripping over themselves to shout 'Basic Instincts'.

    The fireworks of Toronto was nothing to write home about, and I wasn't too impressed. Even the ones of New York, Chicago and others (which we saw later on TV) pale when you compare them to Dubai. And Dubai has such fireworks every *friggin* day during the Shopping Festival. I thought Australia, China and Taiwan put up some spectacular shows. Besides, it was really cold outside in Toronto, and they had a bunch of no-names ringing in the new year. Honestly, how hard is it to get one or two famous people to play at Nathan Philips Square?

    Happy New Year 2006 everyone. May the new year be full of prosperity, joys and realized dreams for all.

    Update (1.20 pm): Did anyone catch the Zee Bollywood New Year concert in Dubai? It was a 'lol' sight to see burkha-clad Arab women jumping up and down to Salman Khan's entry.

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    Friday, December 30, 2005

    2005 - My Year In Review

    From a personal viewpoint, 2005 did not carry much significant milestones. The year began with me in Bangladesh, playing the role of a tourist. I returned to a snowstorm and project deadlines in Canada. All that snow proved good as I organized a ski trip for the BSA in February. In March I bought a new car and sold my old one. In April, the winter finally began to recede and we started to shed our parkas and slip into lighter jackets. Rumana organized an indoor BBQ. The Canadian government got involved in a corruption scandal, and I wrote about how similar Bangladesh and Canada could be.

    In May, winter made a brief reappearance for the BSA trip to Wonderland. Miss Canada became Miss Universe.

    Summer hit Toronto full blast in June, with temperatures heading above 40c. I worried about making parathays and finally got my degree framed. I sort of got the hang of cooking. BANGLADESH BEAT AUSTRALIA. Noha got married. We caught 150+ fish.

    July began with the amazing story of the power supply at the Bengali mela in Dentonia. London won the right to host the 2012 Olympics, and my post on cruel fishing practises was picked up by Rezwan. Behold the Supercycle Watering Stand.

    Come August, came the Miracle at Pearson. England won an epic Ashes test match, and gave me my picture of the year. The ineptitude of Toronto's planners bugged me, oil prices crossed $1.00, and I went to Deep Space Nine. Anyone residing in Toronto cannot forget this storm, and I drove through it.

    As September began, Americans began to fully comprehend the disaster that was Katrina. My post on US and Katrina made its way across various blogs and forums. Shariah law was quashed in Ontario, a position I supported. England finally won the fantastic Ashes series. Ramadan began in October amidst God's October Surprise. Someone told me Toronto ROCKS, and why. An earthquake happened in Pakistan, with some people claiming it was God's punishment. A story about Iftar Parties, and why certain uncles give us no respect. The K-man got married. My post on Eid Party Games proved popular.

    A pretty boring November followed, lit only by the Usual Suspects reunion. I found out what NOT to do in the gym (if you don't want to be considered gay that is). Someone stole our Green Bin (read Behbood's hilarious comment), and our elections began (God, is that how long ago that was?).

    December was a time of Christmas parties, discussing doctor-seeking aunties and arranged marriages, 'caught-doing-wudu' tales and RIS (days 1, 2 and 3).

    HAPPY NEW YEAR 2006 to all my readers.

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    Thursday, December 29, 2005

    Sharia In Canada - II

    In the recent RIS conference, Dr Zakir Naik mentioned Sharia as having two components, i) social policy to prevent crimes and ii) punishment policy to provide justice to victims and deter future criminals. Despite my misgivings about Sharia in Canada, I am going to indulge in a mental exercise, regarding the recent Boxing Day shooting in Toronto.

    According to Sharia every citizen who has a savings of greater than $0 in their bank account each year have to pay a tax of 2.5% of those savings to the public social treasury. This is called Bait-al-Maal, and is used to fund social programs and people on welfare. This was present in the Islamic empire as early as 600 AD, and is quite possibly the first social welfare program anywhere. So if it was in place in Toronto, there would be enough funds to make sure those below poverty line can climb above it, to provide social centers and basketball courts, to have anti-gun programs in schools, to fund police anti-gang programs and so on.

    (As a sidenote, in absence of a central collecting agency, most Muslims pay 2.5% of their savings each year as charity to local and foreign poor people, called Zakat.)

    The second aspect is punishment. It is no secret that Sharia punishments are tough. In this case, all the gang members who participated in the gun battle would be found guilty (based on evidence where innocence is presumed until proven guilty). In Sharia helping commit a crime carries the same sentence as committing the crime, so all gang members would be put to death (i.e. the death penalty).

    Now, like Dr. Zakir Naik, I have to ask the question.

    If we implement a policy where a portion of our savings go to help poor people and social programs to help reduce crime, and then punish murderers with the death penalty, will the level of crime go down, stay the same, or increase?

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    Wednesday, December 28, 2005

    Blaming Blacks and Gun Crime Culture

    Basically a continuation of race and crime from my previous post.

    On Boxing Day (Dec 26), with downtown Yonge St. crowded with shoppers looking for a bargain, rival gang members opened fire on each other, injuring several shoppers, and killing one of them.


    The 15-year-old victim of the Boxing Day shooting was Jane Creba, a Grade 10 student, police said Wednesday.

    Creba was a star student and athlete and will be remembered as a loving and caring soul with a cheerful open heart, said a statement by the family. As I scoured the various news reports for an identity to the killersterrorists, I could not find one mention of their race, ethnicity or description. Probably the newspapers decided not to print those for fear of revenge attacks. Police are still looking for 15 suspects, and have arrested 2 young men. After a bit of diligent searching, I came upon this from the Star.


    A suspect is placed under arrest.

    If there is a major terrorist attack, the first thought that comes to any mind is that a 'Muslim' is responsible. Similarly, if there is any shooting incident in Toronto, the suspect is almost all cases will be black.

    As usual, the blogosphere was quick to comment upon the case. One Canadian commentator described two black gangs fighting, even though such a description is not to be found from either the police or the press. Another said the government should be voted out of power, so Stephen Harper can come and clean up our immigration system. As if all crime is the fault of immigrants. These gang members are probably Canadians by birth.

    I can admit that the first thought to come into my mind is that somehow black culture is a gun culture and is responsible for it. Almost immediately I banished that thought. As a Muslim I am used to people assuming certain things about 'Muslim culture', and blaming the whole community for the action of a few bad apples. Just as Muslims range from all cultures, so do blacks. There is no such thing as a specific black culture. Black Canadians who have immigrated to Canada from African countries in recent times, for example Nigeria or Somalia, are very different from black Canadians from Jamaica, for example. The music industry promotes black culture as hip-hop, drugs, scantily clad girls and guns, whereas black culture as a whole is far richer than that (think jazz, blues, crafts and so on). The media always focuses on the crimes committed by a minority of black people, while it is understood that most black people are just engaged in common, every day activities and pursuit of happiness.

    I can make such a statement and not tarnish the whole black community with the same brush as I am a Muslim, I have first hand experience of how it is. What about those who have no black friends, or have never met any black person, or has never faced any discrimination? I can tell you I have heard first hand comments from some people who have no qualms about saying it is a gun culture 'down there', and so on. People are afraid of what is not their own. Black people have a unique way of styling their hair, or wearing bandannas, or different taste in music, and others are afraid of those differences.

    I was happy to see both Canadian Prime Minister Paul Martin and NDP leader Jack Layton talk about such crimes being a product of 'exclusion'. Somehow I think Stephen Harper's get tough on crime approach will play better with voters. I wish I could combine both their approaches.

    We must give justice to Jane Creba. Those who commit such acts of terrorism must be punished, and given such a strict punishment that it deters other people from picking up a gun in the first place. Tougher laws need to be made and enforced, including mandatory punishment for having an illegal gun, or committing crimes with guns. On the other side, social programs need to be implemented so that underprivileged kids have a choice. Parents must play a role. Young single mothers in particular need to ensure their kids are getting proper attention and moral guidance. The government must help people climb up the social ladder, by a) providing support for mothers so they don't have to work a lot and can be at home caring for their children and b) forcing the father of the kids to play a role in their upbringing. Religious leaders have to emphasize that a materialistic approach to life is not the best one, as well as warn young people who want to enjoy sexual relations without any thought to any of the consequences of the result of such a live-in relationship.


    Police try to direct Boxing Day shoppers away from the crime scene.

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    2005 - Bollywood

    Best Bollywood Songs:

    1. Aashiq Banaya Aapne - Title Song
    2. Garam Masala - Chori Chori
    3. Ek Khiladi Ek Haseena - Ankhiyan Na Maar (remix)
    4. Zeher - Woh Lamhe Woh Baatein
    5. Maine Pyar Kyon Kiya - Laga Prem Rog
    6. Kaal - Dhamaal
    7. Bunty Aur Babli - Kajra Re
    8. Salaam Namaste - Tu Jahan
    9. Lucky - Sun Zara

    Worst Bollywood Movies I Saw:

    1. Mangal Pandey
    2. Kaal
    3. Waqt
    4. My Wife's Murder
    5. Shabd
    6. Kisna

    Best Bollywood Movies I Saw:

    1. Salaam Namaste
    2. No Entry
    3. Parineeta
    4. Garam Masala
    5. Maine Pyaar Kyon Kiya
    6. Ek Khiladi Ek Haseena
    7. Kya Kool Hai Hum
    8. Chocolate

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    Monday, December 26, 2005

    Boxing Day Musings

    After battling the usual crowd at the usual places on Boxing Day (the Future Shop deal on the 1 gig SD card MP3 player was awesome) I drove to Danforth-Victoria Park to pick up some furniture that mom had ordered. For those not from Toronto, Danforth-Victoria Park is the Bengali area of Toronto - lots of Bengali shops and people.

    That area is as Bengali as you can get in North America. Once I was waiting outside (it was summer) while my parents shopped for groceries inside one of those crowded Bengali shops (I hate those) I even saw a chintai - purse snatching. One Bengali lady suddenly started shouting, then two Bengali gentlemen started to chase a young hoodlum, who also looked Bengali. There was a policeman nearby who helped give chase as well. As a sidenote, Victoria Park subway station (known as Bengali station amongst desis) seems to always have a policeman on duty. Probably a good idea.

    As I walked to the furniture shop, I spotted a family entering Marhaba, a big, Bengali, grocery store. Father, mother and a young child (probably no older than 8). Now I could hazard a guess that the family was new to Canada. Even though it was a calm +5 degrees centigrade today, no wind, rain or snow, they were dressed as if it was -40. Woolen gloves, thick parkas with layers, a ninja-type ski mask covering half the face and thick snow boots. I could see people give them the stares. I guess I can call myself Canadian now as I can brave +5 degrees wearing just a jacket over my T-shirts and normal jeans. It's almost BBQ weather!

    As I passed by Marhaba I could see that the child was half way to being a Canadian. He didn't want to enter the store, saying it was crowded. Then the mother started to shout, "Come inside or you will be taken by chele doras (child kidnappers)."

    Boy, I haven't heard that threat since I was ten, and in Bangladesh. And even at that time, I, brought up outside Bangladesh, thought it was funny. Outside of Bangladesh, does that threat work?

    One sign of being Canadian, I think, is the dumbing down of winter. I was at my cousin's place the other night, and stepped out on the balcony along with her daughter. My niece exclaimed, "Hey! It's not too bad, it's only -2!"

    They are now studying for their citizenship exams.

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    Sunday, December 25, 2005

    RIS Day 3 - Reflections

    Attending RIS from Dec 23-26 ... Regular blogging to recommence from Boxing Day.

    As someone who has been involved in organizing huge cultural events before, I know it's hard to please everyone and people will always criticise. Having said that, I must let loose a rant.

    *Rant alert*

    It is all well and good to have distinguished speakers come and proclaim Islam to be the best religion and way of life for all human problems. We know that. It is nice to hear Dr Zakir Nair tell us about comparative religion. It is entertaining and is supposed to make your faith stronger. However, as an event organized by young people I found it puzzling that there was no focus on some specific problems Muslim youth in North America face. Not all of us have media treatment of Muslims, the Israel-Palestine conflict, the Iraq war, the lost civilization of Al-Andulus, the corruption of Muslim countries and preventing selfishness as our top priority. Here are some specific issues that concern North American youth, that I wish would have been raised at the conference:

    1. Finding a life mate, or meeting that special someone.
    2. Finding a life mate that meets our parents' expectations.

      Often we are barred from a young age to speak to the opposite sex, and suddenly its the most important thing to get married. OK, but how? And don't say let parents find someone. Often, they can't. It's not the home country where every young member of the opposite sex is a potential candidate.

    3. Peer pressure at university for drugs, alcohol, dating and cheating.
    4. Work situations. Often our colleagues will go to a bar after work, or have as a topic of their conversation issues that Muslims feel uncomfortable with. How can we mix and develop a good working relation with them?
    5. The stubbornness of some scholars who make irresponsible statements in the media and place Muslims living here in uncomfortable situations. For example stating voting is against Islam (stupid, I know).

    As for the first two, well, you got what is probably a large number of Muslim guys and girls in the same place for THREE days! Like ISNA, a match-making service run by competent, experienced older people would probably have been a good idea.

    *rant off*

    Synopsis: A very dull day.

    For once I reached early (I drove all the way and parked at CNE). Dr. Ingrid Mattson, God bless her, may be a smart and educated Muslimah, but what a boring talk, I am sorry to say. It was about women's rights and places in mosques (and etc.) so naturally we guys would be less inclined, but even the girls in our group decided time was better spent in the bazaar. And that is what we ended up doing.

    I wanted to buy a scarf for my sister, and made the mistake of asking a friend's wife for advice. She gave me a looooong lecture on the differences between hijab, nikab, jilbab, abaya and khimar. I made an excuse and popped into Hijab Fashions. The lady vendor showed me a Calvin Klein scarf.

    Wow, a brand name hijab! I didn't even know such a thing existed. And to give me more choice, the lady said she also has some Adidas hijabs!

    We came back halfway through the lecture on Muslim civilization's contribution to humanity by some sheikh. Or atleast that's what the program said. It was hard to come back and follow what was going on, so I will refrain from commenting on the speech, except to say it was getting really difficult to keep focus. Maybe three days in a row was a bit too much to digest, first up.

    Another talk followed, by an Arabic sheikh, translated into English by another person. Just like yesterday, half the time was lost when Arabic was on. However, I must say for some reason that there seemed to be more (a lot more) Arabs in the audience today than yesterday. The speech seemed to be good, as he got laughs out of them, and quite a lot of clapping. The English translation, when it came, merely woke me up from pretended slumber. However I did catch a joke, about the importance of saying Inshallah. Apparently some guy went to buy a donkey in the market and didn't say Inshallah, I would buy a donkey. He was robbed on the way and couldn't buy the donkey. When he came home empty handed his wife said he was like a hundred donkeys.

    Maybe such comments made my married friends take the decision to go to the bazaar again, and buy some gifts for their wives, Inshallah. When the sheikh started to speak again in Arabic, I decided to join them. We killed time there until after the Zuhr prayers.

    It was time then for Dr. Zakir Naik's talk on 'Quran - the Final Guidance'. Keeping with his style, it was a very entertaining talk, but nothing you haven't heard before. If you have read the book 'The Bible, The Qur'an and Science' by Dr. Maurice Bucaille, that was what Dr. Zakir Naik summarized. I have heard this speech before, but even then I found it good to listen to again. My friends who have not heard it before enjoyed it thoroughly. This was the best session of the day.

    Things were really delayed, and the following session was completely in Arabic. We kept waiting (and waiting) for the English translation, but it came at Maghreb time, so the translator couldn't say much. It was about Purification of the Heart by Dr. Omar Abdel Kafi, and all I can remember is he saying (via translation) that the heart has some diseases which causes our conflicts and we need to purify our hearts. Basically that's what I can get from the title!

    I am sorry if I am making it sound dull but it was like that to me. Another striking difference from yesterday was the presence of heavy security. I was told a secret yesterday, but today the organizers spoke openly about it - misplaced tags and funds. More on that later.

    Sheikh Riyadh Ul Haq gave a talk on selfishness, entitled 'Me, Myself and I'. At the end when everyone applauded LOUDLY, the shiekh then said, this time very diplomatically unlike the first day, that we should take care to do everything in an Islamic manner. Our food, our dress, our manners, our attitude, our applause, if we are to attain Allah's mercy. No one got the stress on applause part and clapped even loudly. For those who weren't here on the first day, the sheikh was anti-clapping.

    The following sessions were taken by Hamza Yusuf and Zaid Shakir on civilization, and in particular Islamic civilization. Dr. Munir El Kassem spoke a abit about Canadian politics and a Liberal rally in an Islamic center in London, and of opening dialogues with non-Muslims and contributing to our wider community. Dr Tareq Suwaidan then talked about his plan to revitalize the Ummah, stressing the need for media, education and so on. It as too bad he came on very late at night, as he had to keep a dozing crowd on their feet (which he seemed to do well with his jokes, PowerPoint slides and some management anecdotes), but we had to leave before he was finished.

    It was really the fault of the evening moderator Moez Masoud. His job was to introduce the speakers and shut up, but he seemed to think he was there to hold a session of his own. He quoted ayahs from the Quran, gave his own talk and basically took up a lot of time. Everytime when he took the podium he wasted time.

    About the misplaced tags and funds. It appeared that some tags were stolen and sold to people in the parking lot at a discounted price by unscrupulous people, so the management appeared to be heading for a loss. When Dr. Munir El Kassem told the audience about this and appealed for donations to offset what he called the 'Shaytan's attempt to infiltrate us', people donated generously. Someone gave a gold chain, someone made a thousand dollar pledge and so on.

    And thus ended RIS. An average to good first day, a super exceptional second day and a ho-hum dull third day. Will I come back next year? I don't know, but I would like some changes in the program to address my rant at the head of this post, and I would like some different topics next year. If it's the same topics as this year, why be back? In the meanwhile, I leave you with some pictures.

    Update (January 2, 2006): Moez Masoud wrote to me:

    Salam Alaikum,

    Jazak Allah khayr for your efforts, and I want to thank you for reminding me of my flaws. I saw your comments online about that night at RIS.

    I just wanted to tell you that upon inviting me, the head organizor specifically asked that i give a commentary for ten whole minutes in between each session but I myself cut down on that. They were trying to make up for not having time for an independent session for me this year.

    I am sorry if I offended you in an attempt to do what I was asked to.

    Sincerely,

    Moez Masoud

    Well, that puts a different perspective to the whole issue. I was not aware that he was just more than a person who was merely introducing the speakers, but a speaker in his own right. I didn't see him as a 'speaker' in the program guidebook and merely thought he was just a person introducing the speaker. As such, he had a right to do what he did and I have to retract my comments about him. My comments about him were also based on what other people reflected to me, but again, as Moez says, he was asked to give a talk, which he did.


    Prayer mats lie awaiting salaat.


    I call it 'Canada-US relations'. I represent Canada. The giant is the US.


    Footsteps to Islamic Financing!


    Mo at his family's stall in the bazaar. His sister created the paintings.


    One of Mo's sister's calligraphy pieces, stating 'Allahu nurus samwatey wal ardh', meaning Allah (God) is Light of the Heavens and the Earth and what lies in between.


    Empty chairs as tighter security meant less people sneaking in.


    My tired feet getting some rest. You can also see I am very bored.

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    Saturday, December 24, 2005

    RIS Day 2 - Review

    Attending RIS from Dec 23-26 ... Regular blogging to recommence from Boxing Day.

    I decided to take the TTC all the way today, instead of partially. That decision caused me to miss Ustad Muhammad Al Shareef's lecture (thank you stupid TTC). The 9.40 bus I was supposed to take came early at 9.35. And the next bus was conveniently late. One and half hour later, as I stepped into the CNE, Sheikh Abdullah Adhami was just warming up to start his lecture, 'Men and Women as Partners of Faith'.

    Synopsis of the Day: Morning session: Excellent. Afternoon Session: Excellent. Night Sessions: Excellent.

    Warning: I took notes, so this is a longer, detailed, post that yesterday's.

    If anyone missed Sheikh Adhami's lecture, I recommend buying the CD. He said men and women are equally important in Islam, and Allah has accorded equal rewards to good deeds by either gender. In the days of the Prophet, the Sheikh said, men and women were equally fundamental in helping the growth of Islam.

    Today, however, we have preconceived notions about role of men and women in society, based on our CULTURE. The Sahaba realized that they were the product of cultural upbringing, and kept it separate from their Islam. Islam also recognizes that man and women are governed by chemistry, by hormones, and rather that fight these natural urges, Islam gives us a system to cope with them, to help us direct our physical and hormonal urges in the proper channels. For example Islam permitted marriage and did not subscribe to abstinence or monkhood. The relation between men and women are then based on pure thoughts, not base desires.

    The sheikh also warned us not to reduce every relation between a man and woman to pure carnal terms. There can be relations between a man and a woman, he said, that can be not carnal and yet pure. They may not be related, yet share an intimacy that is not physical but holy. For example, he pointed us to the relation between Isa (Jesus) (pbuh) and Mary Magdalene, or the Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) and Khawla (Raa). Historians to this date cannot understand the relation between Jesus and Mary, so they try and say she was his bride, and what not. Similarly, some historians erroneously count Khawla as one his wives, when she was not. Just friends, as they say. And it is OK, the sheikh said.

    Following this was Sheikh Riyad Ul Haq's talk on 'A Transformed Ummah'. He stressed that rather than asking others all the time to change their behaviour, first we should concentrate on ourselves, and then our families, and then others. We should first try to become better, remove our bad habits, before asking others. He said the Ummah is just a collective of individuals, and if individuals are bad, then the Ummah will be too. He pointed out that whenever Allah asked the Prophet to teach new instructions, new orders, He always asked the Prophet to first teach it to his own family members, then close relatives, friends, and then the other believers. Change starts at the lowest level, he said. Today, he warned, we make excuses for our own behaviour and weaknesses, but are quick to pounce on others.

    Then it was the turn of Sheikh Abdullah bin Bayyah. He gave his talk in Arabic, and it was translated by Hamza Yusuf. The topic was 'Ettiquetes of Disagreement'. I find it hard to believe such a gentle man can be from Saudi Arabia. I have always associated that country with Wahabbism, a tough, strict, misrepresentation of Islam. But this man is from that country, and I like what he has to say. Why is he not on TV, as the face of Islam, rather than the terrorists in Iraq who cut off peoples' heads?

    The sheikh said while we may disagree, diversity is one of the blessings (mercy of Allah) of the community. He said diversity is a sign of Allah, where he made fruits of many colours, people of many compositions. As such, diversity of opinions, even in Islam and its rulings, is to be expected. What is important, the sheikh stressed, is that such diversity not become a source of resentment. He said Omar bin Abdul Aziz once remarked that he was GLAD that the Companions did not always agree in Islam, as that made broader opinions and viewpoints possible. Also as an example, Imam Malik once refused the Ummayad Caliph's order that Malik's interpretation of Islamic rulings be the official rulebook of the empire, as Malik felt it would reduce chances of future amendments to the jurisprudence. He felt his interpretations were for his time, his place, and fixing it as official would reduce chances of someone else with another viewpoint from challenging it.

    The sheikh also provided some other excellent examples of dissent. Once a group of Companions were leaving for Quraizah. The prophet told them to pray Asr when they were in Quraizah. On the way, the travellers were delayed and it was time for Asr. One group of Companions said the Prophet meant they should hurry and try to reach Quraizah before Asr, and since they were delayed, they should now pray Asr. So they prayed. The other group decided the Prophet meant for them not to pray Asr until they were in Quraizah, so they did not pray at all and missed it. Once they reached Quraizah they sent a message to the Prophet asking him to decide which group was correct. The Prophet did NOT condemn either group - both were correct as they had gotten to their conclusion by logic and best intentions. There were other examples, when learned scholars and Companions disagreed, but they always respected each other, and each other's opinions.

    Differences in interpretation can be due to i)ambiguity of language, ii)selection of hadith. The first is easy to understand, the second was interesting. Apparently Imam Hanifah rejected several sound Hadith in his rulings when they went against jurisprudence and common sense. For example the Prophet said in his hadith that no Muslim should kill another Muslim, but Imam Hanif saw no objection to dropping this Hadith when legislating death penalty for murder. Is the executioner, a Muslim, allowed to put to death the murderer, another Muslim? Imam Hanifah saw no objection.

    This lecture was very detailed, but it was sad that half of it was in Arabic. Most people simply dozed off. I saw one woman watching Gladiator on a portable DVD player during the Arabic portion. Another brother was playing games on his cellphone. Another brother was watching what other people were doing (me). The whole speech should be given in English.

    Then came Sheikh Sulaiman Mulla's lecture on avoiding moral bankruptcy. He was saying it is not enough we fast, pray, go to Hajj and give charity, if we backbite others, we tell lies, we cheat, we usurp another person's lies and we leave debts behind then we will be bankrupt on the day of Judgement as Allah will give our good deeds to those whom we have wronged, and take their sins upon us. The sheikh had a tendency to branch off when making his speech, so he would be talking about A, then branch off and talk about B, then C, then come back to B, then A, then again to D, then back to A and so on. I guess he had so much to say, but so little time. But his content was good, and his qirat, during his talk, was nasheed-worthy.

    And then came the talk. It was Dr. Tareq Suwaidan on 'Islam and Democracy'. This was after the evening break, and my friends and I could not find places to seat except far away from the stage, way behind. And the place we sat was occupied by characters. One guy, as Maniac Muslim would say, was the karaoke attendee. Whenever the speaker would recite a verse of the Quran, he would repeat it. Loudly. Another character was a sister who kept clapping after every other sentence. Then there was the guy who would suddenly wake up and shout 'TAKBEER!' for no reason.

    Dr. Suwaidan was the first speaker I believe should have been given 2 hours rather than 1. His speech was excellent, captivating, and I was engrossed. He stated how Islam supported democracy, freedom of speech, movement, organization, opinion, etc., and how the early Islam was an embodiment of democracy. Due to lack of time, he could not cite hadith and sources for his numerous conclusions, which I would have loved to hear. Once he said that the Prophet made several decisions as a political leader, not as a Prophet, and those decisions are not binding. At this point someone seating one row behind us started should 'No. No!' - before the sheikh could respond, he had to move on.

    One interesting point from his speech I noted down. In an Islamic country, he said, there can be political parties that can be un-Islamic, as Islam supports freedom of speech. During Muhammad (pbuh)'s time there was a Jewish party in Medina and Munafiqueen party, both of which criticized the Messenger of Allah and the leader of Medina to no end, and they were left untouched. Today in Pakistan someone can be hanged on a false charge of blasphemy.

    Dr. Suwaidan also got a big applause when he said today, the Canadian government, due to its practise of permitting free speech and association, and other freedoms, is MORE ISLAMIC in that sense than ANY Muslim country. Big statement, this.

    I attended only one more session. One was the Q and A by Dr. Zakir Naik, the most popular speaker at the convention. Several people asked him questions relating to various aspects of Judaism, Christianity and Islam, and he gave solid, excellent answers to all. If anyone wants to buy this section, I highly recommend this as well. The highlight was the last question, by a sister I presume was Christian. She asked him why Muslims don't believe in the crucifixion of Christ.

    Dr. Zakir Naik explained to her politely our belief comes from the Quran (4:157-158). He also used the Biblical verse of the Sign of Jonah to explain to her, why according to the Bible, Christ could NOT have been crucified. It is too big and detailed to post here. At all times he was polite, witty, and extremely convincing.

    It was getting late, and I had a long journey back home (thanks to TTC). So as Imam Zaid Shakir started to speak, I had to leave. I have never travelled late on Christmas Eve via TTC before, so it was an experience as tired shoppers plopped down with beer cans, as drunkard after drunkard ambled onto the subway, obviously too lost for words to drive home safely. I thought about my RIDE check yesterday, and the sort of company I left behind at CNE. For the first time, I felt my 45 dollars have been well spent, if it has increased my knowledge and understanding of religion.

    Tags:

    Friday, December 23, 2005

    RIS Day 1 - Review

    Attending RIS from Dec 23-26 ... Regular blogging to recommence from Boxing Day.

    "Yes, I know you are headed for the Muslim 'thing' at CNE." The TTC streetcar operator smiled at me. "I will let you know when we arrive."

    "Why, thank you very much." I smiled back at her, then got into my seat, wondering how she knew. Then I realized. As the streetcar passed Fort York street, the passengers were me, two other Pakistani guys, and around 20 young women in hijab. I need not have asked the operator, just followed the hijabis.

    As the vehicle stopped next to the CNE, the two Pakistani guys decided that the presence of so many women meant they would have to act cool. Unfortunately one slipped on the ice on the streetcar steps and fell straight on his bum. The girls did the un-Islamic thing and some started to laugh. And so I arrived at RIS, the Reviving The Islamic Spirit Conference, Toronto, 2005.

    Synopsis of the Day: First session: Bad. Evening Session: Good. Night Sessions: Excellent.

    I had missed the morning session, so met up with my friends and slipped straight into the afternoon session, anticipating a good speech by Eric Margolis, my favourite columnist. My mood soon changed, however, as they announced a schedule change. Sheikh Riyadh Ul Haq gave a talk instead, supposedly on something called 'Divisions of Religion'. I say supposedly, as the talk was all over the space. Now I know he is a learned gentleman, but I must say I was disappointed (bored) with this session. First, he provided no examples. He said people are more observant of religion and yet do not practise the essence of religion, yet did not give any example of what he meant. Once he said we can destroy a Muslim neighbour with a sin of the tongue or the ears, and yet did not specify what he meant. I never got it. His tone was serious (angry) throughout, no jokes, no brevity.

    And to top it all, when some people politely clapped as he ended his speech, he told them not to clap as it was against Islam?!!! Maybe I don't get it. The Muslim community of North America is in many ways an infant community, still learning its roots, you don't need to make things harder for us. If someone doesn't know how to drive, you don't put him on the highway and tell him to worry about checking the blindspot. You show him where the brake is first, then the accelerator. Read Surah Taha, verse 2-3. Islam has not come to make things hard, but to make it easy. What is wrong with clapping?

    This was immediately tackled by the next session. Sheikh Abdallah bin Bayyah was the speaker, and the topic was 'Ignorance and Extremism in the Muslim World'. The only reason I give the session good instead of excellent is because half the sheikh's speech was in Arabic, and translated to English by another person. But what a speech! The content was superb, the examples vivid, and a splendid summary of how ignorance can lead Muslims to either not observing their religion at all, or going to the other extreme and practising a strict but incorrect observance of Islam. The best example he gave was of Caliph Omar, who SUSPENDED the Islamic punishments for stealing in a time of extreme draught in the empire. He recognized the situation and reverted to the spirit of Islamic law, and not the letter. The sheikh also argued that since no recognized Muslim scholar is present in North America to give qualified Shariah rulings, based on not only the letter but spirit of Islam, Shariah law should NOT be implemented in North America, as Shariah could be interpreted falsely. Essentially this is what I argued here.

    I only wish he could have spoken in English throughout, so we didn't lose time for translation. Sheikh Abdallah is presently a member of several legal bodies, such as the European Council of Legal opinion and the organization known as Al Majma' al-Fiqhi, the Supreme Fiqh Council, which is comprised of a body of scholars that come together from all over the Muslim world. These scholars represent a variety of madhabs (viewpoints) and study and analyze issues that confront Muslims in the modern world. He also has expertise in a lot of areas that have been ignored, such as the science known as fiqh al-aqaliyaat, juristic rulings related to minority Muslims. Ironically, this learned sheikh resides in Saudi Arabia. The speech he can give in North America on dangers of extremism, a benevolent Shariah and others is a speech he may not be free to give in the cradle of Islam.

    And now the final session. Clearly the organizers saved the best speakers for the last. First up was Imam Zaid Shakir, and then Ms. Atalla Shabazz (the daughter of the legendary Malcolm X). They talked about Malcolm X, his life, his achievements as a Muslim, his stance against oppression and discrimination, and what lessons we can draw from him. Both speakers were very good speakers, not only learned but also well versed, and knew how to work the crowd. People clapped their applause (I made sure to clap loudly). The best line they said was Malcolm never let his circumstances limit him, only his potential. It is important, they reminded us, that the first slaves brought over from Africa were Muslims. Their blood and sweat and tears helped form America into the power she is today. So Muslims are no strangers to America (read Alex Haley's Roots, or remember Malcolm X (a former Christian and son of one) was descended from Muslim slaves from Togo). Muslims have been part and parcel of America from the start.

    Finally it was the turn of Dr. Zakir Naik. He told us how Islam is wrongly portrayed in the media and why it falls on us to defend Islam and its practises whenever it is wrongly slandered. He gave excellent examples on why Islam is the solution, and not the problem. They call Muslims extremists, but Islam supports being extremely kind, extremely generous, extremely just. They call all Muslims terrorists, but just a policeman strikes terror into the heart of a criminal, all Muslims are required to strike terror into the heart of robbers, thieves, rapists, the unjust, the anti-social elements. He gave practical examples of how verses of the Quran are taken out of context to by many writers (for example Surah Taubah verses 5 and 7, omitting verse 6, and omitting the whole context of the verses 1-4). He told us not to be apologetics. If we don't stand up for ourselves, who will, he asked. Certainly the best speaker of the day.

    As I was driving back, the police stopped me for a RIDE check. The lady officer asked me to roll down my window, sniffed, and then asked me if I was drinking. I said no. Then she sniffed again. Then she asked me where I was coming from. The words of Dr. Zakir Naik ringing in my head, I told her very proudly I am coming from a Muslim festival(?) from CNE. OK, she said, sniffed again, and then gave me a brochure on not Drinking and Driving, before wishing me a Happy Holidays and letting me drive off. Why was she sniffing so many times? Maybe the garlic was a bit strong on the shwarma I had at RIS.


    The main entrance to CNE against a cloudy sky.


    Rows of chairs await attendees for a session at the convention center.


    T, Me and S, finishing up some biryani.

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    Thursday, December 22, 2005

    Garam Masala And Girls

    I watched Garam Masala on DVD yesterday. There is no logic in the movie, yet I would give it 9.5/10. It is funny, completely entertaining and laugh-out funny. This year Akshay should get an award, not Shah Rukh Khan. Rediff review here.

    What struck me as I watched the movie, was that I knew how Akshay's relationship would end. He would be three-timing the pretty air-hostesses, living with them, enjoying from a fiancee, as he tells his friends, 'the conveniences of a wife minus the hassles', or as Raymond's dad from Everybody Loves Raymond put it so eloquently, 'all the bagging and none of the nagging'. The flight attendants dress in skimpy Western clothing, live life in the fast lane, change relationships like musical chairs (from Mac to Sam in one night), all the while Akshay's fiancee lives with her old uncle, dresses in shalwar kameez or saris, and forgives Akshay for EVERYTHING in the end.

    Indian culture (and on reflection desi culture as a whole) has never gotten out of the medieval era. Different standards are still being applied to men and women. Ram goes off to live in the forest, his wife Sita has to follow him. Ram suspects his wife Sita of an affair with the guy who KIDNAPPED her, and Sita has to prove her chastity by walking on coal. These are straight from old Indian scriptures, and the standards are still being applied today. The air hostesses are being portrayed as sluts (a standard the West used until recent times) while the homely girl 'won' in the end. The only progress I saw was that the family-chosen fiancee was studying to be a doctor. In real life it would have been fair for the fiancee to dump Akshay. If she has held herself to a higher standard, it is her right to expect Akshay to live by those standards as well.

    What about Muslim culture? Or even Western culture? I admit both guys and girls ARE expected to live life chastely, but in real life 'guys will be guys' is more suited for guys then girls (hence the expression). At the end of the day, Rahul (from the movie Kuch Kuch Hota Hai - another classic and great movie) still wants to come home to momma with a sari-clad Anjali rather than a skirt-wearing Tina.

    PS. I will be attending RIS over the next 2-3 days, so if anyone wants to meetup, email. My main reasons for attending is to review it, and hear from Eric Margolis and Ms. Atalla Shabazz (daughter of Malcolm X).

    PS2. Check out the spirited comments in this post.

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    UAE: I Wish I Was There

    This is where I was at the start of this year, spending my vacations. One of the benefits of a government job is extra long paid holidays during Christmas-New Year on the top of regular vacation time. I recommend anyone to visit the UAE.


    London, UK. On the bridge over River Thames.


    Abu Dhabi, UAE


    Abu Dhabi, UAE, with my cousin Jasmine. Check the pole out of my head!


    At Jebel (Mt.) Hafeet, UAE. It was 30C in the city, but only 18C at the top of the mountain!

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    Tuesday, December 20, 2005

    The Talk Begins

    I drove to the airport to pick up this friend and his wife. I don't know why he didn't take the airport taxi - I guess he wanted to show off to his new wife that he has friends that will go to the airport for him. I made sure not to stuff the trunk too tightly and put some luggage in the rear passenger seat, so he had to sit up front with me, with his wife in the rear, accompanied by a couple of five-year-old Samsonite suitcases. I am just mean.

    Another couple of my friends is getting married soon, one in April and the other in a few days. This ultimately implies elders everywhere suddenly take an interest in moi.

    "So when are you getting married?"

    "Beta, it's your turn now."

    "Baba," [this is an auntijee] "I have a new sari I am going to wear just for your wedding."

    I have nothing against marriage. I find it surprising that people who would frown at you if you just stopped to ask directions from a girl suddenly decide you should get married and ask you when are you doing it, as if you have a girl ready, and waiting.

    These are the same people who would give you this advice when you depart, after high school, to the big, bad, West for higher education:

    "Remember, you are the honour and pride of your family. You are the example we give to our kids. So study hard and make us all proud."

    Bottom line: Books - good (thumbs up), Girls - bad (thumbs down with astakfirullah).

    Now, it's suddenly the reverse. "Haven't you seen anybody yet?" So hypocritical, our desi world. And it seems girls have it a bit stricter than guys. I am sure they mean well.

    This Ramadan, during the Taraweeh (night prayers), right after the first part (Isha), the Imam (priest) stands up and gives this speech, somewhat uncomfortably.

    "My dear brothers and sisters. I would have to call your attention to an urgent matter. It seems some our younger brothers are not coming to the mosque to pray. When we are praying, they are ... um ... outside, going to the coffee shop, ... or ..." [very uncomfortable pause here, before coming out in a gush] "or meeting, er, some of our, younger sisters."

    I almost had a ROTFL moment there. Guys, will be guys. And apparently, girls, will be girls. Let them meet, Imam saheb, what are they going to do? There's 10 guys and presumably 10 girls. All they will do is sit in two corners of Tim Hortons and drink hot coffee and giggle like high school kids, which they are. But music leads to dancing, dancing leads to touching ...

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    Sunday, December 18, 2005

    Couple of TV Series

    We had some visitors from the homeland recently (who visits Toronto during the winter?) so had to go and do the usual stuff (CN Tower *yawn*, China Town, VicPark-Danforth Bengali mobtown, Gerrard, a semi-frozen Niagara Falls *super yawn*). The best comment, when visiting Niagara Falls, was by the mother of my aunt, a fiesty 70+ old lady:

    "What, we drove all this way just to see some water falling?" Eto duur ailam shudhu pani porte dekhte?

    Fortunately there was a couple of my all-time favourite TV mini-series on DVDs.

    The first was the Pakistani drama Dhoop Kinaray. It's about two doctors. Dr. Amar (the male lead) is an older (40+), completely boring person who is disillusioned with life and going through the motions. Dr Zoya (the female) is a young, peppy, let's-have-masti(fun) doctor. Somehow she's a brilliant doctor by 25 but we'll ignore that for the moment. The story starts when Dr Zoya stars to work for Dr Amar and their on-again-off-again love story. There's also a delightful supporting cast that makes this mushy drama a laugh-out funny comedy at times.

    They used to show this drama on a local Arab channel when I was a kid in the Middle East. I would come back from school on Tuesdays and my mom would be watching it, and my food ready on the table. I would pick up my lunch and sometimes watch it with her. Oh God, why did that Dr Amar not tell the other doctor he 'liked' her? Why did she not make 'dosti' with him? So this stupid drama can be over and I can watch Smurfs. Now I'm wiser, I get it.

    The other is the Best Bangladeshi Drama Ever! If you have to watch one Bengali TV series, you have to watch Kothao Keu Nei (Nobody Anywhere). To give you an idea of how popular this classic was, a major character in the story dies. The day they aired that episode, there was a misil (rally) outside the TV studios, with people protesting at the 'death'. The next day, the Imam (priest) of a major mosque in Dhaka held a janazah (funeral service) for the dead person. This was a character from a TV show. Me thinks Bangladeshis have a lot of time.

    It's the story of a street in Dhaka. There's the street hoodlum (the lead) with a heart of gold, and his gang. There's the working class girl (the female lead), who works as a secretary, is near 30 and is engaged to this college teacher. There's her mama (uncle), a bitter, middle aged man tired of fighting the system, and his wife, a forever sick woman. There's the rich lady across the street who supplies girls to high paying clients. There's the rival street gang, and the ever brilliant cranky lawyer. A complete out-and-out funny at times, but poignant when needed, it captures life on that street perfectly. It's not an art film, it's a drama for the masses - the brilliant writing of Humayun Ahmed switches tones perfectly. You know how some people watch Casablanca or DDLJ numerous times and it never gets old? This is one such piece. Be prepared to shed some tears though.

    A marathon of all-night viewing later, I can say the weekend wasn't a total waste. They don't make them like they used to anymore.

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