Thursday, January 12, 2006

Road Rage Ishtyle

Beside every man acting stupid will be a hot woman.

On the way back from bowling, where I got a ride with Shuaib and Sushmita, we were going north on Warden Avenue when out of nowhere this red Mustang emerged, from a parking lot onto the main road, completely swerving and cutting us off. I think Shuaib literally fell on the horn - it was a prolonged, loud, series of blasts.

The brake lights of the Mustang lit up, and the driver's door opened. Oho! Churir upor shina juri! The guy wanted a piece of us, eh! Shuaib got out as well. And since I was the other guy in the car, I had to get out too. Not that I think Shuaib needed any help - he used to work as a part time bouncer for night clubs in our college days - I was there to stop any fights.

The driver of the Mustang was an Indian guy, our age, with his jeans pulled way up, hair combed back, covered with either gel or Dabur Amla, red pullover, sunglasses on (even though it was 10 pm). In other words, a Hero Hiralal wannabe. He started to shout at Shuaib, who also started to shout back.

Then the door on the passenger side of the Mustang opened. And this woman stepped out. And we stopped arguing. For a moment. She was a really good looking woman. Really hot. Traffic stopper. And she was with this guy? My (unproven) theory was that the guy is a cousin who had come to visit Toronto and she has to show him around.

Anyways, now that the hot woman is on the scene, the Mustang dude decided he had to appear macho. So he stepped forward, clenched his fist, extended a finger out and yelled "Ya, so F*** you!", and repeated the action for good measure.

Except, the finger he extended was his index finger.

Shuaib looked at me, pointed with his index finger, and uttered "F*** you????" I pointed back at him. And we both started to laugh. The guy now appeared completely puzzled, so he "pointed" at us again and swore. And we burst out laughing again. And then his cousin/girlfriend/hot lady joined in! She didn't want to, she was trying to stop herself, but it was funny! And the more she tried to stop, the more she burst out laughing.

Oh it was bad for him. I almost fell sorry for the guy. We were still laughing as we headed back to our car and drove off.

Moral of the story: If you are new to Canada and want to swear, learn the gesture first. Not to mention it's rude.



Anonymous said...

hehee... sounds like one of those ppl who think they are cooler than the general public. lol @ sunglasses at 10pm. I bet if u go to this guys house, u will see ur GREEN BIN :D :) hahaha

- Behbood

Anisa said...

that is HILARIOUS! serves that guy right for acting like a fool! :)

Shabina said...

I like the picture. It really brings out the hilarity of the

Aisha said...

LOL, you have a gift for finding humor and polishing it for all to amuse themselves in :)

Anonymous said...

This comment is regard to the post you made about your cousin going to Hajj five times a row.

Actually it's more of a question. I have heard that there is a five year rule regarding that, as in a person can only go every five years. Does this rule only apply to certain countries then?

--Nadia R.

Abu Sinan said...

Sounds like a big time nerd. You see this here in the Metro DC area a lot. Guy is an engineer or something, was the nerd at Uni, now he makes $150,000 a year and doesnt know what to do with it.

Try to look cool? It fails, but the fact that he has money means some girl, often hot, is going to latch onto him to milk him for what he is worth.

Me and the wife were at the mall the other night and saw this perfectly. Wannabe GQ Indian guy, but still looks like a nerd, with a white lady that could win any beauty contest. I bet they never sold that as an advantage to being an engineering make that much money!

mezba said...

@Behbood: Other than Hindi film songs where stars wear sunglasses inside a dark disco, I don't think I ever saw any guy before with sunglasses at 10 pm!

@Anisa, Aisha: Thanks for the comments.

@Shabina: Thanks for the comments. Microsoft paint to the rescue.

@Abu Sinan: Yup, I have seen lot of guys like that. what's the old saying, a fool and his money are soon parted?

@Nadia: I think it only applies to local in Saudi.

AT said...

i actually had a similar experience last month. One of my bangi friends and I were in the bus. Another bangi dude took the bus as well. I met this dude previously in a very hilarious experience and then he told me his name....i think it was Hasan...neways, he was wearing a white shirt and pants pulled down really low. He was wearing a necklace around his neck and one side of the locket was carrying "mapped version" of Bangladeshi flag and the other side was a picture of a heart. You could tell that this guy is a seriously FOB. However, he proved his FOBiness not through his appearance but his behaviour. Just after the bus started rolling, as a very typical FOB, he took out his cell phone and called someone. Then he starts talking in a VERY VERY loud bangi accent, "What's up dawg!" He didn't say "dawg", he actually said, "dog." It sounded like this, "What's up dog! I am alone dog! pick up me dog! What are you doing at home? Come on dog, pick me up!..." He continued begging his "dog" to pick him up from somewhere. He was talking so loud that his accent was vibrating all over the bus. By looking at the shining facial expression of this guy, you could tell that he was enjoying the fact that he was acting such a gangsta in front of two bangi guys....then, in that bus there was a desi couple sucking eachother's mouth and I could tell that they were getting very very distracted with the bangi accent...LOL

yea, we had a good laugh after the bangi brother left the bus.

Anonymous said...

lol arnab...this was so funny... i have seen some desi guyz too in the metro transit buses here in Toronto. gotto admit...some are just so hilarious u just cant stop laughing...

- Behbood

Isheeta said...

hahahahhaha, that traffic incident is too funny mezba! poor bloke, instead of wanting to inflict harm, he got rebuked himself!

arnab's also having way too fun, incidents like that are priceless! i dont get why other desis think it is so cool to upstage their own desis... it just backfires anyways!