Monday, March 31, 2008

Things I Learnt From The Movie Race

Yesterday I had the good fortune of watching the movie Race. The movie updated me on how India is progressing in ways more than one. For example:

I learned that nowadays police officers apparently don't need to wear uniforms any longer.This is of course so that they may blend in with the local population with ease and keep an eye on them. No study has yet been released on whether the local population of India wears designer shades, leather jackets or drives stunning cars (the old green police Jeep is out of fashion).

Speaking of police Inspectors, whereas in the old days each Inspector was accompanied by a fat dumb Hawaldar, nowadays they come accompanied with curvaceous, long-legged bimbettes wearing miniskirts and dresses with low necklines.Job duties may include cutting fruits, modeling skimpy swimsuits (all undercover of course) and practicing kissing with the boss.

Speaking of secretaries, if you are rich businessman in Bollywood, your secretary must be a super sexy model who, if the situation demands, will go to a club for you and dance on a mirrored floor.I am sure the next batch of graduates at the Indian School of Business must include Sexy Secretary as one of the job perks of being a manager in Negotiations class.

And finally, Indian men are no longer afraid to cry. Every time they engage in sex they must cry.Or maybe, just maybe, since they were doing it in the barn, Saif just got pricked by the Proverbial Needle in the Haystack.

All in all, it wasn't a bad movie!

Previously in this series:

  • Things I Learnt From The Movie Train

  • Things I Learnt From The Movie Vivah

    Maryam said...

    Are you sure it wasnt a bad movie, It was a HOPELESS movie, total waste of time for me, More worse than other Abbas-Mustan movies .... ;-)

    Good observation, Enjoyed reading it.

    Molly said...

    omg that was hilarious.

    I love bollywood but can almost never take it seriously. Especially not the action movies.

    I heart the cheesiness of bollywood and now I want to see this movie.

    did you see eg khiladi eg haseena?

    Anonymous said...

    HAHA. I thought even the movie trailer looked faltu

    - Athena

    isheeta said...

    that was by far the funniest review yet. If they knew how preposterous their movies looked ust from reading your reviews... they might produce oscar worthy films like lagaan or taare zameen something something

    Anonymous said...

    LOL! I find that the more a bollywood actor *ages*, the tighter and younger his clothes gets, or maybe am just being *mean*. I rarely watch hindi movies but the best for me are the 70's movies that my uncle used/still watches. Nowadays, it's just too much and you can't watch them with kids. sf

    Suroor said...

    Haha! You are so witty.

    Anonymous said...

    i liked the movie, although I must say, its a typical Abbas-Mustan flick.

    The shooting of the movie was done in South Africa, so maybe they encourage street clothes and a hot chic to accompany officers :)


    mezba said...

    Maryam: Welcome to my blog. Ah, it was a time-pass movie - nothing exceptional about it though - and the climax made no connection with the rest of the movie!

    Molly: you have to see this! It may not be as cheesy as it sounds here - but it's fun.

    I saw Ek Khiladi Ek Haseena - that was one good movie.

    Athena: the trailor made it appear as if it was about the horse racing world - it wasn't.

    Isheeta: Unfortunately I have come to the conclusion that well made movies rarely do well at the box office - Indian public just wants some masala time pass movie. One reason Taare Zameen Par did well was because of Aamir Khan. Iqbal was another good movie that didn't make it big because it had no big star in the leading role.

    Sf: haha that was a good comment! At least Amitabh is not going around wearing tight clothes yet *shudder*

    Suroor: thanx! :-D

    Behbood: Yep - typical fare - though the twists and turns were intruiging enough. They still have to touch the heights of Baazigar and Khiladi though - a genuine who-dun-it.

    Anonymous said...

    are you kidding me? of course he has to cry, look at him, the guys got man boobs, how can he not cry??? :)

    Molly said...

    about thought provoking movies, did you see Omkara? Thats on my top list of favorite movies ever, not just favorite desi movies, but fave movies EVER.

    Molly said...

    he also cries a lot in parineeta.

    I love that movie.

    I was watching it last night, question: I'm (obviously) not a hindi/urdu speaker, but their language seemed a bit different. Is it a diff dialect?

    Anonymous said...

    K, I watched it, on youtube!!! lol
    It was ok, though too *confussing*, but I must say that the skirts keep on getting shorter and shorter :D. sf

    Anonymous said...

    they cry after sex? maaan that's messed up.

    mezba said...

    Everything: lol! true that... although I think it's more to the pose and angle rather than anything else!

    Molly: Oh Omkara has to be amongst my favourites due to Saif's acting.

    Molly: the story of Parineeta is set in West Bengal so they must speak Bengali (in the film it's Hindi with a Bengali accent, maybe?).

    Sf: as the skirts go higher, so does the attendance!

    Anon: apparently.