I hate liars.
There's the type of lie that I can understand. For example if you are unemployed for the time being but are ashamed to admit it, I can understand if you lie and say "Oh I am in school" or "I am on a little sabbatical".
We had a friend while in school who once said, "O I loved this course so much I am taking it again" - he fooled no one but himself but the lie was excusable as he didn't want to admit to failing the course.
Then there's the selfish liars. These people are ever ready to accept and ask for your help. The moment you need a little favour, however, the lies start coming right and left.
"Oh, I would love to take my car, but my mom needs the car just at this time ..."
"Oh yes, I had the DVD, but just last week my cousin borrowed it. Just last week."
"Oh no, I had that book, but I can't seem to find it now."
Selfish people.
Then there's the group who lie for no reason at all. This to me is most perplexing and puzzling. I met someone at a party and she told me she was studying to be a pilot.
OK. Not something I heard everyday, especially from a brown chick, but I can handle female pilots. Then later I learnt from someone else she is studying to be a nurse. And yet another person could swore she said she was going to be a journalist. And then her husband tells us his wife is taking some courses to be a chef.
What for?
And what really gets me, is how easily many people lie. And I am not talking white lies. Their imagination as they go from lie to lie is praiseworthy. During our final year in university, a friend once had a book I wanted to borrow, but he was leaving shortly. So I called up this other guy who lived nearby and asked him if he could pick up the book.
"Oh my car is in the garage since yesterday."
"Really?" I tried a shot in the dark. "I could have sworn I saw it in your driveway when I drove by your area this morning."
"Oh yea it was fixed but when they returned it, my mother noticed something that was not correct and we gave it back."
"Oh, you must give me the number of that garage that is open on Sundays I really need one."
"Well its usually not open but the guy specifically drove the car to us."
Sometimes I just string them along for the fun of it, but there's something wrong with a selfish liar. Especially those that selfishly lie to friends.
Tags: Liars
The personal, official blog of author Mezbauddin Mahtab
10 comments:
yes, and i find desis to be particularly afflicted by this condition. I dont understand it.
The most common ones are lies about past grandeur. "Oh in Pakistan I lived in a mansion the size of the city block. We had ten drivers. We had four swimming poools." Uh. huh. yeah. Sure.
Or "I'm the principal of the school". And they are the teachers aide.
I dont udnerstand it at all.
Very well said mezba. This thing is too common with the brown "fraternity". Everywhere you go, you see this sort of behaviour happening with someone or the other. I think the reason for this is, since the brown people have been told by their parents or whoever that a respectable profession is either Doctor/Engineer or anything that is uncommon and hard to get in this day and age, they try to connect themselves to one of those professions. Maybe they feel guilty for not achieving one of those professions and want to achieve it by fantasizing about it. I have heard it too. The lies you have heard are low-scale ones. Let me give you a high-scale lie that's too daring as well. At my company, I do conduct technical interviews of potential candidates. We got a resume once that said that 2 years ago, this person had worked at XYZ company as a Software Architect.
Nothing wrong with that you may say right?
But it so happens that 2 years ago, I happened to be the software architect at that XYZ company. :|
Best thing was, I didnt reveal it out to him, and he played around the game with lies flying left-right-center and giving me examples of how he tackled situations while he was there and stuff.
Now that's something, isnt it? :)
- Behbood
i have found that more often then not where we assume that a person is not telling the truth they in fact. Just as desis have a problem of telling lies other desis also have problem of assuming people are lying. There is a good possibility that your friends car may have come back not repaired and I know plenty of car repair shops in TO that are open on friday. Trust me when I tell you that world is a much better place when we choose to see the good in people and assume the good in people.
i have to admit that i am a liar. the selfish kind, but only when it comes to my books. it has taken me quite a while to build up the collection that i have now. And it just annoys me to no limits when they fail to return a book they borrow, or they return it in less that perfect condition.
i am not that way when it comes to other things. which should explain why a girl has yet to return 3 of my DVDs she took 4 months ago.
i hate people who don't return your things. and hence i think my lying is justified =)
Hmmmmmmmmmm Very nice thoughts
Regards,
Samiha Esha
You did a good job of categorizing the types of liars. I find it very easy to spot lies.. too easy.. I wish I didn't :S
Aisha: Yes I find that exaggeration is one of those lies that although I should not condone, I myself am sometimes guilty of - honestly speaking. I may say I made 10 runs in a game when I made 3, or so on ;-) However I would NEVER pretend to be a pilot when I could be a chef, or something to that affect. I find that such conditions are not restricted to desis alone, even other groups do it.
Behbood: Wow, that was daring, not to mention illegal. Too bad he chose the wrong person to practice upon! I suspect he didn't get the job? Although now I find that after I did a post on liars, some of those situations are applicable to us as well - I remember heling to doctor (well 'fudge' resumes of friends a bit when we graduated).
Anon (12.07) Nah in this case he was lying. He is a known liar. And he just does not want to help.
Nowal: Ya I can relate. I got a huge collection of DVDs and books that I have built over 10 years. I am particular about who I lend to and then I start bugging them if I dont see a sign of the return.
Samiha: :-|
Liya: Ya, I would not like to have the talent of Mr Spock or Deanna Troi to be able to tell when people are not being honest - I think we are all better off that we can't read each other's minds, aint we?
"Especially those that selfishly lie to friends."
Then they arent friends, are they?
They are more of acquantances/pals...
You know what?! I love this post so much, I'm going to make copies and personally mail them to all my desi friends! Like anonymous said, the "brown fraternity" is affected by LYINGITIS.
Well any society which is status conscious ends up with people using lies to protect or promote themselves.
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