Western Canada Diaries - 5. Banff Sulphur Mountain Gondola

[ Continued from Part 4 - Calgary Olympic Plaza  ]

Banff.

Beautiful Banff.

 

I am so jealous of the people in Calgary. They just live an hour and half from this little spot of heaven that is the Banff National Park. The roads in Alberta are wide, and since we went in the middle of the week there was no jam. It was a lovely drive and soon the scenario changed to a mountainous one.

 

There are many things to do in Banff, so this post will focus on the Sulphur Mountain Gondola. It's one of the first things you do when you go to Banff. You can book your timeslot online as well for even greater convenience.

 

 

The best experience is to take the Ultimate Explorer Combo, which is what we did. You can spread out your visit on the sites across several days.

 

The gondola soon takes you high above the mountains. It's not exactly like the Switzerland gondolas where you go high above the clouds, but pretty close. And of course, the scenery is AMAZING.

 

Soon you are way to the top of Sulphur Mountain. And it's not just one peak.

 

They have built a whole walkway between two or three mountains so you can take a lot of time to explore and take pictures, which is what everyone does.

 

You can budget easily 3-4 hours for this. Keep in mind that some of the paths had stairs, so it's not completely accessible.

 

Overall on a beautiful day there is hardly a better and more scenic place to be in Canada than Banff, and the Banff Gondola will give you the best views of it.

 

Western Canada Diaries - 4. Calgary Olympic Plaza

[ Continued from Part 3 - Calgary ]

Olympic Plaza is a beautiful square in downtown Calgary, great for a leisurely walk or stroll, or for spending time people watching.

A rabbit was munching lazily on some grass in the park. 

 It's quite popular with office workers during the lunch hour, and was built in 1988 for the Olympics as a site for the medal presentation ceremonies.

Beautiful flowers lined the square in every direction.

Even the Duck Dynasty was out in full force.

A shot of the Calgary Tower in the distance.

 

Driving to the park from the suburbs can be a challenge, with the buildings and cloud cover sometimes hindering GPS - not to mention one way streets and streets that aren't really streets but LRT tracks!

Overall you can budget about two hours to spend some time on a nice afternoon at this park when you are in Calgary, especially if you are there to see the rest of downtown such as Calgary Tower.

Photos taken with an old Android phone camera.

Next post: Banff Sulpher Mountain Gondola.

 

 

Do you need to spend $100K+ on your wedding?

Desi weddings are notorious for being a big affair. Over 300 guests is normal (that's actually small). In India and Bangladesh you can easily have a guest list of over 500. Large halls in Mississauga and Brampton in Ontario are testament to the fact that brown weddings are a huge business.

Recently a status started to be forwarded on social media (mostly by already married millennials) about a guy stating how he did not want to get married in a huge and lavish ceremony. Here's an excerpt (emphasis mine).

 You "invest" $100,000 and what do you get out of it? A few nice portraits of you and your family wearing some South Asian Halloween costumes? Or for a dumb 3 minute wedding video to put on youtube?
$100,000 for some pictures and a youtube video. How's that not a ponzi scheme? And here's the thing. I know many people in our community may be wealthy, but who HONESTLY has $100,000 to spend? Who REALLY has that much money?

Now here's the thing. If you had asked a twenty year old me I would have agreed 100% with this writer. Of course weddings in our community are needlessly large and shamelessly an occasion to flout one's wealth. When you are twenty, you are idealistic. You aren't experienced in the nuances of real practical life.

And you of course bring religion into it because you think it supports your ideal fantasy.

Of course Islam tells us not to be lavish!

Of course we should not be extravagant!

Here's the thing though. Once you are thirty plus, you start experience life as it really is, not as it should be. And you learn that many things you once idealized as black and white really has lots of shades of grey.

For example, one of the weddings (with Ramla bint Abu Sufiyan) of Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) was thrown by the King of Abyssinia himself. It's hard to imagine that wouldn't have been at least a semi-lavish affair. Moreover, when the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) married Maymunah bint Al Harith, he wanted to invite all of Makkah to his wedding. That would have been at least 300 people, if not more. So while Islam does take a stand against extravagance, and urges people to invite both the rich and poor to weddings for there to be blessings, it doesn't define extravagance.

And that is the whole point.

The answer to Do you need to spend $100K+ on your wedding is very simple.

It depends.

Do you have over $100K+ to spend? And spend so it won't hurt you, bankrupt you, derail your future etc.? Then go ahead ... spend it.

If you don't have that money to burn, then simple. Don't burn it.

Recently a friend of mine got married. His marriage was a blast. There were days of functions, of music, of masti, etc. It felt like I was back home in Bangladesh. Except it was all here in Toronto (or, to be precise, Brampton). I am guessing he has the money to burn. Who am I to tell him that this money is not going to buy him happiness? Maybe that's what he always wanted to do - have a huge blast at his wedding.

More and more millennials are now not following the older generation's lead in inviting every body in their contact book for their wedding. They invite only close friends and then have a huge party. What's wrong with that?

And also, there's nothing wrong if you don't want to spend that much. It's all a matter of what you want balanced with what you can afford.

When I was a student, I bought an old used car for $5K. Even that seemed a lot of money, but the car took me everywhere. I maintained it well and it served me for over ten years.

Then, when it broke down, I bought a brand new car for $25K. It did the same things as the first car did. I could have spent less, but I didn't. I wanted a new car, and I could alhamdulillah afford it. I knwo there's lots of comparisons between getting married and buying a car, so I am adding this one there as it makes the point.

I am not going to get into shaming anyone who had a big, beautiful, desi wedding. If you can afford it, and if you wanted it ... all the more power to you.

Western Canada Diaries - 3. Calgary

[ Continued from Part 2 - Planning ]

Calgary's official slogan is "Be Part of the Energy". They should just rename it to "Be Part of the (Oil) Energy". You get a reminder of how important Big Oil is in this province. Everything seems to be sponsored by them, even universities.

The size of Calgary really caught me by surprise. Coming from Toronto, we Torontonians are used to the importance of Toronto in Canada, and sort of visualize Toronto as the largest city in Canada. While that is true by population, when you take land area into consideration Calgary is much larger than Toronto.

You could start in one corner of Calgary, drive for 40 minutes and still be in Calgary. They have divided the city into four quadrants and most people live in the suburbs. Travelling from the NE corner to the NW corner can take half an hour, driving 90 km per hour on the wide, open highways.

When you compare with Toronto, Calgary is definitely cleaner. There’s no rubbish on the streets and even in the suburbs the houses are kept immaculate.  However the weather in Calgary is awful. It’s July - the middle of summer - when we went and the temperature is 13 degrees at night (and sometimes it fell to as low as two or three degrees!). I was shivering in the night, and reading about hot weather alerts of 37 degrees back home in Toronto! In the day it was a comfortable 20 degrees ... if it wasn't raining cats and dogs.

There's not a lot of unique things to see in Calgary (you get a stadium, a tower, a zoo etc. everywhere), but there are a few. Most people spend a couple of days in the city before they hit the Rockies, which is what we did.

Next post: Calgary Olympic Plaza.

Western Canada Diaries - 2. Planning

[ Continued from Part 1 - Overview ]

It's very important to plan in detail for a trip to Banff and Jasper National Parks. It's not like a trip to a beach resort where you just show up. That's a lot to see and do, and if you want to get your money's worth you have to put in the proper planning.

Hotels
June, July and August are peak times for hotels in Banff and Jasper, and they fill up fast. Banff and Jasper are small towns (located inside the respective national parks) so there's not a lot of hotels and accommodations. Some places fill up to a year ahead, while others are fully booked by April or May. If you want a block of dates, it's best to book ahead.

But what about the weather? Sure, it would be nice to be able to wait until the last moment and book according to sunny weather, but that's something you can't control.

Renting a car?
Well, you will need to rent a car. There's hardly any public transit between the sites in the park. In the city of Banff itself there's public transit that's small and inadequate, so most people rent cars. This is where I find Tripadvisor and Google Maps extremely useful. I use TripAdvisor (particularly the forums) to make a list of attractions I want to see, and how long I need to budget for attractions. I then plot the points on Google Map.

This gives me an idea of the distances which help in itinerary planning.

How many days?
This of course depends on what you want to do exactly. At the very minimum, I would recommend booking for three days in Banff and two in Jasper. If you are doing other activities such as hiking or biking along trails, or taking time off to canoe, you might need more time.

Where to book?
To see Banff National Park, most people book in the city of Banff itself. Some also book in nearby Canmore (which is about 30 minutes away). Calgary is about 90 minutes away from Banff National Park.

For Jasper, the choices are further limited. You can book in the town of Jasper, or Hinton (about an hour away). Another option (if your itinerary is well planned out) is to book in lodges or hotels along the Icefield Parkway (which we did). More on that in a later post.

Dresses
You need to be prepared for all types of weather. This is mountain territory, and the joke is if you don't like the weather - wait ten minutes and it will change. If you don't like the change, wait ten minutes again.

The mountains are gorgeous but make for unpredictable weather.

It could be sunny and hot, then it could rain, and then a mist can come in with temperatures dropping, and so on. I wouldn't take winter coats for June, July and August, but rain coats, a light jacket etc. are a must. As are T-shirts and shorts. And full pants. You get the picture. If you have kids, this means you need all types of dresses, and backup dresses.

Do you need a park pass?
Well, yes. To enter and partake in any activity in a national park you need to purchase a pass. The question is weather you need to purchase a Discovery Pass (valid for a group in a vehicle for two years - 2016 and 2017).

If you are going to rent a vehicle for your group and be in the parks for a week or more, it's well worth it. Daily entrances are $20 for a group. It's valid for all parks across Canada.

Cell Phone Coverage
It is important to remember that there is NO CELL COVERAGE past Lake Louise through the Icefield Parkway up until you are in the town of Jasper. Absolute nada. You are literally in the middle of nowhere.

Next post: Calgary.

Western Canada Diaries - 1. Overview

Years ago I did a series called the "West Coast Diaries" where I recounted my travels of the Pacific coast of USA. This year, I fulfilled a long time dream of touring a couple of provinces in Western Canada. Along with my whole family, we flew to Calgary and from there on travelled throughout Alberta and British Columbia, putting on nearly 4000 km on our rental. Along the way, we saw breathtaking sceneries, from high mountains to prairies to untouched serene lakes to glaciers to cozy little coastal towns to big cities. Canada is truly a beautiful, and vast, country.

My brother took this shot of an elk in Jasper

Our trip included kids (a one and a four year old) as well as elderly folks (my parents). Thus we had to take lots of preparations before we embarked on our trip.

• We went to the Dollar Store and bought lots of sticker books and colouring books for the kids so they would be busy and entertained on the long drives. In addition, I downloaded quite a few of their favourite movies on to the iPad, as well as taking some small toys for the road. The advantage of the colouring and sticker books was that they could be thrown before we flew back to Toronto.
• Each trip was planed with plenty of pit stops, along with a limit on maximum amount of driving per day, and rest days in between.
• Thus we chose quality over quantity. We would rather see two or three things every day, and spend on time on each, rather than trying to rush and see much more. There's always more things to do and see than you can or will on any sightseeing vacation.
• I also had to cut down on some things that we simply would not be able to do with kids (especially one in a stroller) such as hiking in the national parks or parasailing in the Okanagan Lake.

This was a rough map of our travels.

We chose to drive in a circle and see Calgary, Banff, Jasper and Edmonton (before returning to Calgary). We also took a side trip to Drumheller before this trip. After suitable rest, we drove across British Columbia to Vancouver (via Kamloops and Whistler), before returning to Calgary via Kelowna. When we were in Vancouver, we took a couple of days to visit Victoria.

In the next post, I will iA talk about what to do before you even start the trip, planning and resources to check out before your trip.
 

Ottawa Tulip Festival

I recently spent a little time in Ottawa at the city's annual Tulip Festival.

The story goes that in 1945, the Dutch royal family fled Holland, which was overrun by the Nazis. They found safe heaven in Canada, and every year the Tulip festival in Ottawa commemorates this long lasting friendship between the two nations.

Interestingly, while in exile in Canada, Princess Juliana gave birth to a daughter, Princess Margriet. To mark the new princess’ birth, the Dutch flag was flown at the top of the Peace Tower. This is the only time a foreign flag has flown over Canada’s Parliament Buildings. Canada also temporarily declared the hospital she was born in as extraterritorial.

The Canadian Tulip Festival is also a celebration of the return of spring, with over a million tulips in 50 varieties blooming in public spaces across the National Capital Region. The highest concentration of tulips can be viewed in the flower beds of Commissioners Park, on the banks of Dows Lake, where 300,000 flowers bloom. The National Capital Commission (NCC) manages more than 100 tulip beds at 30 different sites.

You can experience the festival at various sites throughout the city. It's the largest of its kind in the city, attracting over 600,000 visitors (Source: Ottawa Tourism).

Of course, if you want to get all Bollywoodish about it, you can watch the video of the song Dekha Ek Khwab from the movie Silsila to get you all into a Tulip mood before you visit this festival! One not to be missed, and Ottawa has plenty to do in the summer besides tulips.

IFS Spring Carnival 2016

Our local mosque, the Islamic Foundation of Toronto, holds a Spring Carnival every year. This year, with the weather being really nice and warm, we decided to check it out with the kids. Yesterday, as we were driving to the venue, I remarked to my wife that we are going to a mosque for a carnival, whereas if it was for a prayer session or halaqah we would have been thinking about it! The big attraction, of course, was a Ferris wheel that they would somehow fit into the parking lot.

Unfortunately, the weather was not cooperative. Unluckily for all involved, the mercury chose today to dip down well below seasonal. As I am typing this today, a day after, it's actually snowing! Snowing, in May! And then a couple of days later it's supposed to be really warm and hot. That's Canadian weather for you.

It was really too bad, as the organizers had put in a lot of effort for the kids, especially getting bouncy rides and castles for the young ones. You can't plan for the weather really, but May is a tricky time for outdoor events anyways. A better time might have been after Ramadan in July, when the worst that can happen is a quick thundershower. Here, the temperature was actually in single digits with the wind chill and only a few brave souls were out enjoying the merry go round and other outdoor rides.

There was also an outdoor petting zoo, and the kids were having fun feeding the animals snacks and touching them. The sheep reminded me of Dolly, the first cloned sheep (or maybe that's how all sheep look - I have no idea).

I had an interesting thought here. In the deserts of Arabia, the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) and his followers would sometimes hold prayers for rain, because it was so rare, it was always hot, and rain was always welcome. What about here in Canada? Should we pray for heat and not snow / rain? Would that be OK?

Of course, since it was too cold outside in the parking lot, we went inside to check out the bazaar (a mandatory part of any Muslim mela).

Now the bazaar was made up of the usual suspects.

• There was a guy selling cheap toys from China.
• There were the usual hijab vendors.
• Some people were selling mango shakes, popcorns and cotton candy.
• There were some vendors with "Eid dresses" and other ethnic wear.
• Some vendors were selling desi food such as samosas and biryani.
• Few sponsor booths such as Mina Halal giving out free hot dog samples and coupons. You take a lot of these coupons until you realize they expire in a month!
• Finally there were some (few) unique booths selling a little upscale stuff (such as Kaamilah Boutique).

Overall it was a nice little fair, organized well. If the weather had cooperated, it would have been so much more busier and fun.
 

My Liar Mom: A Mother's Day Poem.

This is a beautiful poem a man wrote out of love for his mother. His mother had become a widow in Bangladesh at a very early age, and raised her young son all alone, working hard for him, until this son got established and had a huge job in USA.

The poem is being recited by my father. I don't know who is the original author of the poem - if you know please let me know so I can credit the author. The poem is in Bengali, so I am attaching a (rough) translation here. Remember, a lot is lost in the translation.

--------------------
A long time has gone by, and still for my mom I cry
For my mom used to always vehemently lie.

Lonely we became, with death of my dad
My mom aged faster, with the worries now all on her head.
My mother said, a star in the far away galaxy was my dad
He would come down if I studied and got educated.
I did study, and amongst the stars I searched for my dad,
For me, my mother’s lies started with that.

“Get married again”, friends and relatives advised her
Difficult would be the long life all alone to bear.
They said, “Select a man and get married again, and come to your senses!”
Mom said, “I have no time for such nonsense!”
“Am I alone? Look! My son is with me here,”
That was another lie she could easily utter.

On the sewing machine my mom worked all night, making new clothes in batches,
Struggling hard for my life to be a little bright, yet her own old clothes had multiple patches.
Her eyes were sleepy, she was tired when a needle pricked her hand,
“Mom! Come, leave the work alone and sleep!” Was my demand.
“I am not sleepy,” said my mom, “I don’t need rest.”
That was another untruth to which my mom would attest.

Every day after school, she would pick me up,
My mom would wait for me, standing with no shade, and in the sky the sun high up.
The hot sun and humidity made everyone huff and sag,
Yet every day without fail she used to hand me an ice cream from her bag.
I held it out to my mom, “Here … take a bite,”
To this, she would say, “oh no, it’s all right.”
“You have it all. My throat gets infected if I have something cold,”
For me, that was another lie, she easily told.

In a big city I got a job, quite good
Got married, settled down as life eventually would.
In a posh location I got a house well furnished
With an interior decorator, each room was nicely made.
My mom still lived in my village
All alone in the darkness of load shedding, trying to light up a candle.
As the lights of the city shone and dazzled.
“Oh mom”, I said, “Come! Leave the village and come here to settle.”
Mom said, “It’s so nice and open here.”
“Why should I go to your hot and crowded city?”
“Actually if I stay in a closed room all day I get asthma attacks,”
Once again my mom lied.

After this my status went even higher
Job in World Bank with lots of power
Busy all day, I met people in rows
How is my mom, I had no time to regularly check up on her and know.
A day came when I heard she is sick and bed ridden,
Hit with a sickness that has no cure in Bangladesh.
I flew out to her, it was now a long journey,
I begged and pleaded with her to change her mind.
“Come with me States I beg of you.”
“The best doctors will take care of you.”
“These types of illnesses are no big deal there,”
“In seven days we will cure you and have you back here.”
With a smile on her face uttered my mom,
“I am not supposed to fly don’t you know!”
“Nothing has happened to me, don’t you worry.”

That was the last lie she told me.
A few days later, died this extreme liar.
For my lying mom, till today I cry.

Why is Blogging Dying?

This is a surprise post as I had no plan to write on this. But I have to.

As I see the wild fires ravaging Fort McMurray (and a silent prayer goes out for them), I see why the two forces that blogging used to make fun of - traditional media and social media - come to the fore in reporting this story, while bloggers lag far behind.

There were many reasons why bloggers used to make fun of traditional media. They were the establishment, they were dinosaurs, they had an agenda, they had to toe the party line ... etc. etc. These were (at some times) valid concerns, and bloggers were at the forefront of breaking stories. They were beholden to no one and could write whatever they damn pleased.

In the 2005s, it was so. Bloggers were suddenly the new cool thing. The Liberal party leadership convention that ultimately chose Stephane Dion had a blogger outreach program and a place for bloggers at their convention. I know, because I was one of the bloggers. At that time I used to blog (actively) on Crescent Canuck.

Slowly but surely, traditional media fought back. They had more resources to cover a story, had more experience in prioritizing stories, and were actually accountable (to a degree) for telling the truth. They had more credibility. Reporters also became bloggers (or had a blog). Some bloggers became news agencies, such as Doha News.

At the same time, social media such as Twitter and Facebook were breaking ground. At first we bloggers rubbished these sites (ironically the same way newspapers rubbished bloggers). 140 characters is too small to express a complex thought on a complicated issue, we argued (true). But just like Trump followers don't care for the truth, Twitter interactions never cared for the nuances that a blog could provide.

Today, blogging is cumbersome. It's far easier to interact on Twitter or post on Facebook. Blogging platforms have simply not kept up. At the same time, the good bloggers are those who blog often, are corporate and made themselves semi professional. Amateur blogging, as blogging was mostly, is dying.

Partly it is also the sign of the times. Nowadays we simply don't have the time to read a person's thoughts in the form of a blog post. Much easier to read a small tweet, and respond. And that, in the end, is why blogging is slowly dying.

Now, please share this article on Twitter!

Six Lessons from the Jian Ghomeshi sex assault trial

Jian Ghomeshi was a somewhat famous radio personality in Canada. In 2016 he went on trial as some (three) women accused him of sex assaults way back in the past. Since it was so far back, all the judge (and jury) had were his words versus theirs. Here was a dominating radio personality versus what could charitably be called as his former groupies. The case attracted wide coverage in Canada and shone a spotlight on sex assault trials, their flaws, and women's rights as a whole.

To add spice to the mix, the lawyer defending Ghomeshi was a woman herself, a brilliant solicitor named Marie Henein. She completely skewered the witnesses and their statements, cast doubt on their allegations and brilliantly defended her client. In the end, Ghomeshi was found not guilty and many feminists turned their ammo on Henein, calling her an anti-feminist and an anti-woman. Another case is pending trial as of this post.

Here's six lessons I drew from this whole saga.

1. Life isn't fair.
   
   Maybe Ghomeshi is guilty. Maybe he isn't. We will never know. All we have is that there wasn't enough evidence to convict him based on some doubtful allegations. This is why we Muslims are taught there is a Day of Judgement at the end of Time where God will dispense perfect justice for everything that happened in this life.
2. Be smart. Shit happens.
   
   Just because you are right, doesn't mean you will win (see Point #1). Ghomeshi’s accusers ignored some common-sense rules.
• Don’t talk to the media.
• Don’t communicate with the other complainants.
• Try to remember every detail of the assault.
• Comb over old emails, correspondence or interactions with the accused that could be used to contradict or undermine allegations.
• And, most important: Tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth.
3. Don't be a slut, regardless of what some (extreme) feminist activists say.
   
   It has become common now to say being a slut is being "empowered". We have Slutwalk in Toronto where women dress provocatively (or don't dress at all) and go for a parade, and are ogled by bystanders and whistled at, and somehow this is empowering.
   
   You should never be sending a picture of your naked self to anyone.
4. Do not lose your objectivity over adulation. Do not be a groupie. Have respect for yourself.
   
   These women did not stop corresponding with Ghomeshi even after their assault, and continued to speak glowingly about (and to) him, and only turned bitter once they were ignored.
5. Again, regardless of what some people teach you, if you are a woman - take care of yourself. Be careful.
   
   Yes, we know it isn't right that a woman ever be subject to a sexual assault. No matter what she is wearing, doing, saying - it isn't her fault.
   
   Yet, that theoretical principle won't stop an actual assault from taking place. Be careful, be vigilant - always.
6. Finally, just like I shouldn't support Ghomeshi just because he's a guy, as a woman, any women shouldn't feel the need to help other women just because they are women. Do what's right, always.

Which TTC Seat is the best?

I have been travelling in Toronto using the "better way" aka the subway aka TTC for the last 3 years. Since I get on at the end of the line, I have a whole empty subway train in the morning to select from as to where to sear. It's a debate that has often plagued me - am I using the best seat for optimum comfort? I present to you the options.

This is the typical layout of a Toronto subway train on the Bloor-Danforth line. A group of 5 seats in close proximity to each other.

Seat A - Good if you are a thin person (I am not). You have a whole side to lean against (on your left), so you can simply cozy up and sleep.

Seat B - Really tight. Sometimes someone like me seats in Seat A, so they are really occupying a little portion of Seat B. Then you really have 80% of Seat B. And a pillar. This is the worst seat.

Seat C - I like this seat. The empty space between this and Seat D means lots of space if you are not exactly thin. The pillar prevents the person in Seat B from occupying your space. The best seat, in my opinion.

Seat D - Once again you have a whole wall to lean on. But your leg space is tightly cramped first by person in Seat C, and second from the heating duct at the bottom. So you have a full seat till your waist, and then three quarters of a place to put your legs down. This is a seat for thin girls.

Seat E - the back up seat to Seat C. You have a whole space on the left of the seat (or right if it's on the other side) to stretch out. There's a pillar to rest your head on (not shown in this picture).

What do you think? Which seat is best?

Remember, the target is to peacefully sleep like this:

So if you know which door to enter from when the train comes to a stop, you can go grab your seat.

As a bonus, here's the seats on the smaller Scarborough RT.

The Scarborough RT's a really short ride to fall asleep (plus it's Scarborough so you really want to be awake) but I think in this case, seat C is the best. You have this whole space between the seats, so it's not just the seat, but more, and a pillar to ward off other encroachers. Good seat design.

Frustrating Reponses When Talking of "Islamic" Mortgage

I will be blunt - whenever I see an ad for an "Islamic" mortgage, or a commercial on how to finance your house "the halal way", my scam alert meter activates. They go through all these fancy brochures explaining their methodology (why? how long does it take to explain how you are lending me money and making a profit?) and at the end of the day, it's interest - just called differently ("profit rate" - whose profit? How do I - the buyer, the borrower - have a "profit rate"?).

The fact that it's all a scam isn't even an outrageous idea; BBC had an article on 'how Islamic is Islamic banking'. The very fact that an Islamic bank can give you a bond (which by its definition is tied to an interest rate), give it an Arabic name (sukook) and thus make it halal tells you all you need to know that most Islamic 'halal' financing is a big scam.

But this post is not about that. This post is about how, when you tell some Muslims this, and why you will be forced to go to a conventional banking for a mortgage, they come up with all sort of statements that frankly says they haven't even spent a minute thinking about the issue.

Why do you need to buy? You can rent all your life?

OK, so unless you have done a comprehensive rent vs mortgage calculation, such as this one in the Financial Post or Toronto Star, you shouldn't be saying this. What it usually means is that you as a Muslim have decided not to borrow from the bank and pay interest due to your religious beliefs (fair point), but because of this you have also decided renting is far better than property ownership (debatable). Most articles that say renting could be better always say could be, or may be, or possibly. They also make a big assumption that you will invest the savings you get when you pay a lower amount of money in rent into the stock market, and that you will invest successfully, and you will have no landlord issues, and so on. Plus, rent is also going up every year.

You don't need to borrow the money, you can save and buy it outright.

Ya, right. Every year the prices continue to rise, and the rate far exceeds an average person's saving grace.

Muslims should reconsider living in the first world where prices are high and buy properties in Muslim countries where its cheaper.

When a scholar actually says this, you don't know whether to laugh or cry. First of all, the price of a house depends on where you live, but so does your earning! I can buy a huge plot of land with a house on it in Rangpur, Bangladesh, for less than my monthly salary in Canada, but what good does that do me? I live here, I need a house here. If I lived in Rangpur, I wouldn't be making the money I make here, so the scale of that house to my earning would be the same scale of a house here to my earning here. It's the same problem.

And anyone who thinks house prices are cheaper in Muslim areas clearly hasn't even done their research (Dubai? Islamabad? Dhaka? - just to give a few) It's this type of lazy speaking that bugs me. Do your research and bring some interesting points to the debate.

Quran says interest is haram. Period. Surah X, verse Y.

Usually accompanied by a Dr. Zakir Naik picture.

Look, no one is arguing that. Or debating that. But the Quran also says eating pork is haram, and we are well aware that Quranic verses do not apply when there's a necessity. If you are in a desert with nothing to eat for days and then you see a pig, you are allowed to kill it and eat.

But we are not in a desert. We can live without purchasing a house. It's not a necessity.

Well, some scholars say it is. Let's debate that, shall we. I am not saying they are right or wrong, but let's hear what they ...

Nowadays scholars will say anything for money. They will say anything is halal. It's contradictory to the Quran!

Exactly! So is "Islamic" financing, yet Muslims seemingly ignore those issues because it has an Islamic label to it. Again, I am not saying let's all go to CIBC and borrow some cash, I am saying let's talk about this intelligently.

There's nothing to discuss. Interest is haram. Period. You don't need to buy a house, you can rent it.

Aaaaaand we are back to square one.

Look, just pray 12 rakat daily and you will get a house in Jannah. Ha ha.

What. The. Fiqh.

That's like a person who cut his finger going to the doctor and the doctor is saying don't worry, in jannah you will be a young beautiful man with a houri. Solve the problem here and now.

Most Irritating South Asian Habits

Don't misquote me - being South Asian is a great thing. I used to joke with my wife that there are two types of people in this world. Desi - and those who wish they were desi.

Of course, being the huge multi cultural amalgam that South Asia is, there are some ... shall we say ... extremely irritating habits that we have that I absolutely, with all my heart, hate. So let's be controversial and list them.

1. Not taking off your shoes or sandals when entering someone's house.

I am going to call out the ladies here. What's with NOT TAKING OFF YOUR SANDALS when you come into someone's house? I know you spent a lot of time putting on your sari and getting the pleats right while wearing your sandals to match for the height, but please take off your bloody sandal when you step foot into the house!

I have decided to stop being polite on this issue and just call out people who do not take off their shoes when entering my house (politely, of course in a passive aggressive manner, we are still Canadian) by sending this article to them in their mail.

2. Picking up someone's baby when clearly you shouldn't.

Humanity, as a whole, have a thing for babies. We love to cuddle them, hug them, pick them up, kiss them, and say nonsense words to them. It's overall a good thing, and no doubt plays a part in the propagation of our species. However this is NOT a good idea when you have a cold and are sneezing and full of germs and antibiotics.

At a party recently this aunty who clearly had the sniffles (btw why are you EVEN AT THE PARTY? Couldn't you call and cancel since you clearly are spreading germs all over but I digress...) wanted to pick up my baby son because she was seeing him after a long while and how much he has grown etc. etc. That's where I stepped in and said, "But aunty you have a cold."

That should have been enough but like a bulldozer that mated with a rhino the comment clearly did not penetrate her consciousness and she replied, "Oh it's just nothing. I don't even have fever any more."

That's when I said, "No aunty, I would prefer you not touch him."

Further discussion was prevented when my son so helpfully decided at that point to burst out crying and shrieking with all of his power so I deftly exited the room with him and deposited him with his mother. Good timing, son!

When I returned I overheard aunty saying to someone (another aunty), "Oh nowadays these kids read too much from online. In my day ..."

3. The Weight Watchers Club

No, this isn't the club of uncles and aunties who are trying to lose weight (although they really could). No, this is the cabal (yeah, that's the right word) of uncles and aunties who have noted down with precision what you used to weigh at a certain point in time and how much you have put on from that time till today. I have written about them before.

I think one day I will really lose it if some uncle tries to make some comment.

"Oh, so you seem to have put on some weight ..."

"Oh, so your daughter is going out with a white boy ..."

4. Not Showing Up For Time. Ever. Even For Your Own Wedding.

I get a wedding card and this is really how it reads.

6 pm
Arrival of the guests.
6.30 pm
Entrance of the Bride and Groom.
7 pm
Nikah Ceremony
7.30 pm
Cake cutting ceremony and speeches
8 pm Skit by the couple's friends and relatives
8.30 pm
Dinner

And this is how I edit it.

6 8 pm
Arrival of the guests.
6.30 9 pm
Entrance of the Bride and Groom.
7 930 pm
Nikah Ceremony
7.30 10.30 pm
Cake cutting ceremony and speeches
8 pm Skit by the couple's friends and relatives  rescheduled after dinner
8.30 11 pm
Dinner


I think this post is to be continued ....

Bajirao Mastani The Latest in a Revisionist Agenda

Bajirao Mastani is the latest attempt by a revisionist agenda of corporate India to highlight any non-Muslim figures in the history of India. Before recent times, the fact remains that the glory of India has always been under Muslim rule for over the last 1000 years - from the Delhi Sultanate to the Mughal empire.Yet the Indian media only highlights Akbar (and to some extent Shah Jahan) because Akbar was the least Muslim of the lot. He founded his own religion (Dil Ilahi) and married a Rajput princess. He is the one glorified today in India and the rest of these Muslim rulers - who led India to heights that she hasn't reached even today - are forgotten. Some are actually vilified - such as Aurangzeb - with allegations against him debunked by many historians yet repeated all the time by those with a Hindutva agenda.

Instead, we are taught about the greatness of a man Bajirao, a petty man who managed to carve a little country for himself when the Mughal empire was in decline, and who actually hastened the decline leading to the acceleration of British control over all of India. Similarly they highlight the story of another loser called Maha Rana Pratap, who sniped at the Mughals from the sides and again gave the British an opening they wanted. Meanwhile, real heroes who faught against the British such as Haidar Ali and Tipu Sultan - no movies are made about them because they happen to be Muslim.

The inconvenient fact remains that for the vast majority of Indians, going from Muslim rule to British rule was merely a change of masters (and the British were the far cruel masters). Only the Muslims were affected as they used to be in power, so they fought for freedom. Not until the War of Independence (or the Indian Mutiny) did the rest of India join them. Gandhi was a much flawed man whose tactics did not win India independence - it was the guerrilla attacks by many others (such as Bhagat Singh and Master ji) and the pressure of American diplomacy amongst other factors that caused it. Gandhi did not even want independence; he wanted India to be made into a dominion. Yet today he is the father of a nation.